A Family Wedding: By Eleanor

 So, I was lucky enough to get invited to my beautiful cousin’s (and his bride!) wedding. Set in the middle of June, you’d be expecting lovely weather too. Well you’re not too far off, add a few showers which happened to time themselves when the photos were planned and you’d be right. Luckily the weather cleared up and we *touch wood* got some lovely photos.

 The wedding itself took place at Dragon’s Hall in Norwich, gorgeous building. Just enough place to hold everyone you love, or to quote Sam during his speech ‘It’s so rare these days to have everyone I care about in at one time’.

 Unfortunately, the building and the amount of people didn’t have great prospects for hearing. It is always daunting when I’m put into a room with lots of people I don’t know, and some I do. It’s even worse when the room is full of noise. Family conversations were impossible, and there were plenty of awkward silences as we realised breakdown of communication. I asked my mum if it were just me that struggled to hear, but she said that my uncle Neville had problems with his ears and Sam himself had an ear infection so I wasn’t the only one! She did also say it was difficult in there for, well, hearing people.

 The ceremony itself was exactly as I anticipated, simple and formal, just like Sam and Sophie (the bride) would like. Sophie’s dress was beautiful, not too over the top as I’ve often seen at weddings. It was clear that they love and care about each other very much which was sublime. I’ll admit I didn’t hear much of the two readings that different family members read out, but I’m sure they were just as pretty too. The vows were spoken and the pair were married at last!

 We then went back downstairs for the photos, which consisted of waiting around being offered delightful tasty offerings and champagne. My brother told me that there was a rainbow outside so I said ‘no’ and signed rainbow to him. I then started to sign ‘I can see a rainbow’ and asking what the next line was. This then resulted in my brother asking people, my nan asking people. Nan insisted that there was a line with colours in and asked me how I’d sign that. I explained I’d sign all the different colours and showed her a few, red, pink, blue etc. She seemed really excited about it all and encouraged my cousin Jack’s girlfriend Kristina to join in. Later, during the meal, Jack asked us if we wanted to read his lesson plan, which he had converted into his best man speech with his actual speech on the back of it. I started to read the back until my brother took it off me and told me to wait. I said I probably wouldn’t hear it anyway so I’d like to read it. My mum suggested Jack could sign it to me, but I am the only family member who actually knows any sign. Kristina piped in and signed pink and blue as I had shown her earlier. Everyone looked impressed. It was a sweet gesture, but sometimes it really disheartens me that no-one in my family know sign. It would really benefit me, I know I’m not fluent but even to just have Sign Supported English (SSE) or clear lip patterns would ensure I’m always included.

After the amazing buffet styled meal and the oh-so-good desert it was time to move onto the speeches. Unfortuntely I couldn’t really tell you what they were about. The first one, was done by Sophie’s dad (he seemed a lovely bloke). I only got bits and pieces, something about Sophie going to Africa and then something about Sam. It seemed very warming and everyone seemed to like it. The second speech was by Sam, which was lovely, I understood most of it. It was about meeting Sophie and thanking his family and then everyone else that had come to the big day. Then it was the turn of the best men (both his brothers). Jack did a lovely speech about how Sam was his best friend and the things they did growing up. He wished love and happiness for the young couple. Then it was Leon who I didn’t really understand. I asked if I could read the draft speech paper that he’d been reading off. When I read it, it was beautiful, a clear big brother role with embarrassing stories, including a brown log shaped toy that appeared in one of the baths they used to share.

After the speech I was lucky enough to have my boyfriend join me for the evening party when the band came on and the free bar got flowing. I find it strange when bands play, I don’t quite know what to do with myself. I can never seem to really dance unless I’m holding someone’s hand, and usually with rather a lot of alcohol in my system. To me, it just sounds like noise. I can’t hear the words, or the different instruments and I have no idea how to move my body to appropriate sounds. Everyone else on the other hand let themselves lose and had a good boogie! As my boyfriend says ‘I like a good dance, it’s good for the soul!’ It was lovely to see everyone dancing and enjoying themselves. Often, I find it more fun to watch than actually attempt to dance myself!

 During the night, I found moments where I realised I’d lost that connection I’d had with my cousins years ago. Back in the days when I’d stay over at my nans with my cousin and we’d giggle about sharing a big double bed together and planned menus to draw up for when the whole family came round. It made me think of times the whole family would be together and we’d play Trivia Pursuit or card games. I vaguely remember bingo making an appearance too. I know that life consists of paths and the further we follow a path, the harder it is to come back and remember those that helped you get there. It’s difficult to find the time to keep friendships going, and being aware of your common interests to help those conversations flowing.

 On the bright side, I was really happy that I managed to talk to my uncle Neville during the night. We talked about lots of different things including photography, sign language (where he proceeded to sign the whole alphabet) and he said he’d read my blog which was really sweet. He could understand where I was coming from with listening to bands, and it was just really nice to still have that connection with that side of my family. Thank you Neville, you really made my nightJ.
 I also got to play life sized Jenga against my brother, I lost the first game but it was totally worth it as he happened to be standing where it was falling. I don’t know if he was more worried about himself or his drink in his hand! And, to make it better, I won the second game.

 Thank you Sam and Sophie for inviting me to be a part of your big day, after all that waiting and preparation it finally arrived and it was sublime. I send you lots of love and good health wishes on your newly married life together. Perhaps it won’t be too long before I get some more cousins!

 Also, on a side-note, just incase my brother reads this; it was a lovely ‘joint’ 21^st bash for you. My little bruv is growing up!

"Magic Hands": Cbeebies - by Imogene

Yesterday I was watching some Cbeebies with my son. I watched his favourite programme with him and up pop a sequel video of a new programme that’s coming soon to the channel called “Magic Hands” – I was so fascinated by this trailer as it appeared to be done by Deaf people as their wasn’t much sound and I noticed there was BSL! I thought this was great as I already praise Mr Tumble (another Sign-Language programme) and Freddie has started signing “Hello” and “Spotty Bag” from that so was interested to know more about this new programme! I went onto the internet and typed it in and found the Cbeebies Grown-Up page and I have to say it seems really good!

“Magic Hands is a show featuring poetry for children translated entirely into British Sign Language (BSL).

Featuring poems from Robert Louis Stephenson to Roger Stevens and Michaela Morgan the programmes are fun, five-minute packages that mix sign language, the spoken word, music and animation to bring the poems to life and capture the imaginations of both deaf and hearing children.

The production is breaking new ground; it’s the first time poetry has ever been translated into British Sign Language and the first production with an entirely deaf cast using British Sign Language.

The Magic Hands presenters are all new to children’s television and are all profoundly deaf. On set they worked with professional interpreters along with the series’ artistic director, Jean St Clair, and both deaf and hearing production crew.”

I wonder why there is a new BSL programme. Is it because there are more children that are deaf? Or is it because Mr Tumble’s been so successful that they find more children are learning more from it? I’m just glad there’s more deaf awareness coming in for the younger generation. And of course BSL isn’t just used by Deaf people but by children who have communication problems, who have now found a way to speak!

I tried uploading the trailer video, but I can't find it, but this is the only thing related on Youtube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_VrrjB0GPR0

I am very excited to watch this, and mostly see how my son interacts with it! (I shall report after our verdict!)

*The writing in red is from the Cbeebies Grown-Ups page - No Copyright Intentions.

How I could imagine dealing with the news of having a disabled child - by Imogene

This is a topic myself and Eleanor was talking about the other day. We were chatting about one of the latest storylines in our favourite soap 'Hollyoaks'. The storyline is a couple of months old now, but it's about a young couple who have had a baby boy, and find out at the first hearing screen that he is profoundly Deaf. We both rather liked this storyline, what with being deaf, but also as it tackles and shows how people deal with their child having a disability. Like in most soaps they don't handle it very well. But after the screening, I enjoyed the episode where the mother went to visit, almost immediately after the birth to find a way to make her son 'hear'. It was very emotional as, she is desperate to help him and talks to the doctors about ways to make him a hearing child. There was a discussion on having a cochlear implant, but they found it wouldn't improve him anymore than he is. So they've gone against having the operation and now are living with a child who can't in affect hear anything.

It then lead to a discussion on how we would cope in the same situation and we both had different views with linking similarities.
I always think if I had a Deaf child that I'd be completely fine with it, as I'm deaf myself and have an understanding of what type of life you can lead with deafness; however that's only with hearing aids. But saying that, if my child had a profound level of hearing I would know that my child would almost be in safe hands as I know some teachers of the deaf around my area and I know they give 100% in the learning of each child. I would also know that there is support networks out there to help and there is BSL (British Sign Language) as a way of communication, so as a deaf person - It is possible to lead a normal life.
Obviously as a mother I'd worry about them growing up and hoping people become more deaf aware so that they can get the most out of their life. But as to quote Eleanor it is scary for new parents who don't know about being deaf and the support a child can get - it's terrifying. It's like if you imagine our child being blind - we'd worry!
Which is so true, it's only because we're in the boat, that we'd be easy to accept, but if it was any other disability we'd all worry and panic about the support and the type of life our child would be able to lead.
I personally did have the same worry with my son when he was born, not that he was Deaf, (I knew he was a hearing baby as soon as he came out) but the doctors did have a worry that he could possibly have cerebral palsy, and breathing problems as he didn't react to some of the tests they do to make sure they're healthy and everything is working as it should. At that moment when they said that I burst into tears, simply out of being scared. I didn't really know what it meant, nor what it was really - not enough to be clued up. But my gut instinct wasn't as if he did have any disabilities, some might say it could've been a natural denial state or mother intuition. It turns out he has neither of them things and is perfectly healthy!
But for that couple of days, I now understand when I read/see how people cope with a new baby being disabled. I suppose it's mostly because we all crave for a happy, healthy baby, simply as it's a easier life for them and probably deep down for us too.

So, How would I cope with the news of having a disabled child? I don't really know, I think I'd have to be in the position to be able to tell you. I know I would do my hardest to help to give them the best possible life, and make sure they were happy and felt loved. I know I would deal with them being Deaf very well, simply because I know how life is for that - so It's only because I have the experience. It's true, we're good with what we know.

I'd love to know your thoughts, or experiences with this article? How did you deal with the news that your child was deaf/had a disability? How would you cope with the news?

(This article is only of my own opinion and I hope non of the content offended anyone, as it certainly wasn't meant - Imogene.)

Imogene: I spotted with my little eye..

...Sign Language in a television advert!

Yes, I was very impressed to see an actual person signing in a TV advert in the middle of the day, like they've always done it! But, I actually have never seen someone signing on a TV advert? (Has anyone else and I've not spotted it at all?) I've seen it on the programmes (usually at 4 in the morning etc) but never adverts. Made me smile to see some deaf-awareness going on at prime TV time.
However, I don't need the sign language, but there will be very many that are extremely grateful to be able to understand the advert. I did find it extremely random as to why it'd be on a solicitors advert - but more to the point, it's something new and hopefully will spread!
Thank you world for finally accepting us!

(watch the advert here)