Captioned Glasses @ National Theatre

On the 29th December I went to a captioned performance of Warhorse at the National Theatre.

 As many of you may know I love nothing more than heading to the theatre with captions (by stagetext) but my experience is often varied as I have to rely on theatres to advise me on the best seating for optimal view of both the captions and the stage. Sometimes this works really well and others, well it's just hard work, mainly because there usually are two screens placed either side of the stage but the height and how far inwards they face can vary at different theatres. This can really make or break the enjoyment of the show. The further up or outwards the screens, the more you have to move your head each time someone speaks, missing vital movement on the stage (or just pure talent and craft) particularly as your eyes readjust each time it moves back and forth.

Today was different however with the additional use of captioned glasses, a scheme rolled out by the National Theatre, London who currently have them available for screenings of Warhorse and Hadestown and hope to have them readily available for all shows next year. This is something that I'm unaware of happening elsewhere in the UK.

 When I arrived at the National Theatre I was bowled over by the support available. There was someone available to give me a full tutorial, they were available during the interval (personal service as they note your seating) and they were very open to feedback at the end. I've never seen such support widely given for deaf people, perhaps my only criticism would be whether any of them are able to sign for BSL users, that was something I did not ask.

 So, my opinion of the captioned glasses? Invariably, mixed. Let me summarise using a classic pros and cons list.

Cons

1. It is bulky. There is no getting around that. The glasses themselves have bulky sides to them, the lenses are thick and connected to a wire and a black box which is safely hung around your neck which can get slightly weighty after a while.

2. There is no 'safe' place for them. I held the glasses in my hand or put them on my head for safety during the interval. Going to the toilet whilst balancing an expensive pair of captioned glasses was definitely an experience.

3. It's not great for glasses wearers. Although they have adjustable sides theres no getting around the fact that they are leaning on top of your glasses which feels heavy after a while. A few people noted issues with their varifocal glasses etc around me (I'm such a nosey person).

4. The glasses make everything seem flattened and slightly darker, losing some of the joy found in the theatre with real life actors. I felt a little like I was watching TV after a while as the glasses gave a flattened 2D effect. 5. It was difficult to feel comfortable as the bulky sides made it difficult to be aware when people needed to get out of the aisle next to you resulting in a slight apprehension of when this would be and annoyance when someone did this unexpectedly. Me personally, I rely heavily on my peripheral vision to compensate for my hearing loss so it did give me a claustrophobic feeling after a while.

 Pros

 I imagine after reading the cons list you're thinking, is there any pros ?! Well, in a word, YES. For me, I was delighted in the fact that the writing was clear, readable, (mostly) in time with the show. I am so thankful that someone is coming up with an idea that in theory, could be a solution to a problem that has unnecessarily hindered and continues to hinder deaf people.

Would I wear them again? Yes I would, but only alongside the captioned screens on the side of the stage so that I can rest my face from the weight of both glasses (personal and captioned) during the show.

In conclusion, my opinion is that captioned glasses has so much potential but for me, it's not quite there yet. But now, having had the experience, having tried this technology, I have feelings of not only happiness but also enlightenment and a sense of achievement as I realise that other people care about equal access just as much as I do. Thank you.

 If you'd like more information about the captioned glasses at the National Theatre then have a look at this; https://www.nationaltheatre.org.uk/your-visit/access/caption-glasses .

CI Activation, 3.5 months on by Eleanor

And breathe. Half-term at last, phew.

It has now been 3 and a half months since I was activated and I've found the more time that passes the less I have to say. Not in a bad way but just in a 'it's going alright' way. People still ask me now how I'm getting on, and honestly I often forget that I'm wearing a processor. My personal feeling is that this processor is better than when I had two hearing aids, even my Audiologist would agree with averages of 70-80% results on word lists without lipreading.

 Music: I actually enjoy a range of music now. Back when I had hearing aids I didn't really get it, I couldn't connect. The only songs I'd really like were sad songs or songs with heavy singing so I could sing along over the din of the background noise. Now, it excites me to pick out the different sounds, to hear the bass creeping up, the piano picking up tempo, the saxophone coming in or the electronic (and sometimes strange) modern sounds added in. I can't pretend I love all music just yet, I've only just started to scratch the surface, there is so much more to explore!

Events: Since being activated I've been to the cinema to see 'Beauty and the Beast'. It was amazing. I didn't know what to expect particularly with it being a musical and having not been activated for long, but I was impressed. I'm realizing now just how hard it is to describe sound, but that's not stopping me having a go! Belle's voice (Emma Watson) got right under my skin. I still hear it in my head sometimes. Now, I don't know if she had a good voice, I've never been the best judge of singers, but it felt so smooth, crystal clear and soothing alongside the instruments.

I went to see a Theatre production a few days ago, called Room, you may have seen it on film recently, a hard-hitting drama that has been inspired by cases of kidnapping (such as the Fritzl case) with 'Ma' who was kidnapped 7 years ago by 'old Nick', impregnated and now has a 5 year old son Jack. The Room is all that Jack has ever known, he thinks that TV is made up and doesn't understand there is a whole world outside. The play has been adapted a little, with some songs added in. Ma often sang, it was really heartfelt and emotional. Sometimes the older version of Jack would sing, an interesting contrast from the smooth, velvet woman's voice to the deeper, harsher tones of a man. I liked them both and when they both sang different words at the same time, well it just made something inside of me swell, like an invisible force of emotional strings twisting and pulling my stomach, my lungs and my heart. Music can be so powerful, so gut-wrenching, so defining that it actually hurts and when it does finish it's almost a relief not to have to feel such a force anymore. It's also stupidly addictive.

 Speech: I still lipread. A lot. But sometimes its more out of habit than necessity. Sometimes I've sat and just listened, seeing what words I can pick out without lipreading and I'm surprised by the results. I mean, I still need serious clues such as context but it's improving everyday. My hearing rehabilitionist talked about auditory memory, even hearing people don't actively listen all of the time, they remember routines, predictable phrases. For example, in a shop, you can guess that questions would be 'do you need a bag' 'do you have a loyalty card' etc. Hearing people don't always listen, they assume/predict and use a handful of prepared responses. When meeting with someone you've not seen for a while, you can guess the questions will be 'how are you' 'what have you been up to' 'we should meet up soon'.

 My understanding of speech is improving all the time and it's impressive how natural it is. The more I expose myself to speech, the more I seem to understand. However, there are situations where I've found not even lipreading can help. If I'm in a room with other people having a different conversation, it bothers me. It bothers me a lot. Even if they are speaking quietly, it's as if they're right next to me talking down my ear. It's distracting and I'm unable to differentiate between the persons voice that I'm trying to listen to from the other voices. I cannot pick out anything related to my conversation, I can't even focus on lipreading, I'm so distracted that I lose sense of the context and my annoyingly natural 'deaf nod' means the conversation carries on without me in it.
 Background noises such as crisp packets being opened and constantly rummaged through (or any kind of packet), keys jingling, printers printing, spoons being stirred feel so loud that my head wants to pop. It makes it so difficult to focus on speech and I'm so distracted.

 So please, if you do happen to see me, be considerate and don't eat, don't fiddle with anything, open doors, print anything or talk to anyone else. Just sit, actually, stand quietly and smile. Thank you.
 

Post op checks.. continuing the CI journey.. by Eleanor

No need to worry, I am still here!

 I thought I'd better write a lovely blog post to update you all on my Cochlear Implant journey.
It is now exactly 3 weeks since my operation and I'm feeling great. Nothing hurts anymore, nothing aches, nothing throbs or groans or tries to remind me of the fact I have a implant in my head.

However, I am constantly reminded of how deaf I am. I know, I was deaf before the operation, and I'm still deaf now and I will always be deaf. But, having just one hearing aid has hit me rather hard. It's gotten to the point where I don't even notice people chatting away on my right side (the implanted side) until I look round. I'm zoning out all the time because I'm too tired to focus, and I'd much rather be at home in the land of silence and not having to listen to anyone. My world is an oral world, which was why I wanted to take this journey, to be able to access it a little more easily. This isn't forever, I know that, but it doesn't make it any easier in the now. I'm waiting rather impatiently for the switch on date and once I have that, I'll know there's an end to this stage and the start of a new and exciting one.

 Last week I went back to the hospital for a post op check, where I was asked to go to X-ray for a head scan to check the implant was in the right place. I also saw the nurse who checked inside my ear and the wound. Everything is healing so well and I'm amazed by how easy it has all been. It really is just waiting now.

 A few weeks ago there was a programme on Channel 4 called 'Breaking the Silence' which showed 7 people getting their CIs switched on for the first time. It was all filmed live, a brave decision by channel 4. I'm not really sure why they felt they had to show it live, nor why they had to show 7 people getting switched on. Don't get me wrong, it was very interesting and I enjoyed it (apart from the dodgy subtitles...) but couldn't help wishing it had been more of a documentary, showing the journey of CI, from assessments, to switch on, through to a few years later. Hearing is such a difficult thing to explain. I don't know what it is like to be hearing so I couldn't ever be accurate in telling you, but for people who are hearing, that's all they've ever known. How can you explain something that comes so naturally? It's like when you think too much about the way you breathe and suddenly it becomes very overwhelming and you think you've forgotten how to do it.

For anyone interested in Cochlear Implants, Breaking the Silence is a great place to start, but there is oh so much more I could tell you. And pretty soon, I hope there's even more I can tell you, in between listening to your impressions of Donald Duck...

The surgery... The journey to getting a Cochlear Implant by Eleanor

So, the surgery went well! It was a rather surreal experience, as if I was simply going on an adventure than having a operation. It was easier to think like that, otherwise I may have been rather more scared and anxious about the whole thing.

 I was wheeled into surgery by the nurse and porter, and I remember the porter asking me if I liked being called Ellie or Eleanor, to which he responded something about his daughter or granddaughter being called Ellie and he had large tattoos on both arms reflecting that. I remember thinking, why am I going into surgery if I can hear this conversation - maybe it's all a joke and I can actually hear perfectly fine?

Then someone gave me an injection and took my glasses off, and the next thing I knew I was being woken up from a really nice dream. Now I don't remember the dream but I do know it was a really good one because I was so annoyed at being woken up. In fact I was so confused at having been woken up, that I was sure this was the dream - waking up in a hospital bed with a sore throat and limbs that did not want to cooperate - not even to get my glasses on so I could actually see what I was seeing. Luckily, this disorientated feeling didn't last long, and I soon remembered why I was there. Although the wound didn't hurt, I knew something had been done to the right side of my head (they did the right side, phew) as it felt numb and rather sticky. It also took a while to put my glasses on as the nurse put some gaze to protect the wound from the glasses arm. This has now been taken off as I'm determined to avoid any kind of infection or anything that would require a repeat performance.

 A little while after I came too, the nurse who had wheeled me into surgery came back and asked if I was feeling OK. It was really hard to speak as my throat hurt so much but I was able to squeak out a yes, and was wheeled back to the ward. Mum was waiting for me back in the private room (with an ensuite, check it out!) which was really nice. I'd definitely recommend taking someone with you, there's a bit of a wait before and after and generally just having someone around just feels really nice :). Once I was back on the ward, it was just a matter of sleeping, attempting to get up for the toilet and also eating. The consultant came through a little while after and asked to look at the wound. He said it looked good, surgery went well and if I could eat a little then he saw no reason why I couldn't go home that evening. I was really happy about that as I hadn't really wanted to stay overnight in a strange place feeling groggy and unwell. So when the sandwiches came I tried my very best to eat, although I really wasn't hungry yet (odd for me considering I'd not eaten since 7.30am that morning and it was now getting on for 7pm).

 A few hours later and I was allowed to go home! I was so relieved and so grateful to my mum for hanging on till I was able to leave. In fact I was just grateful for her being there the whole time. She really is the best mum in the world.

  After mum brought me back to hers, I slept and slept and slept. By the next evening I started to feel a lot better, just with a bit of a sore ear. Today, 3 days on, I'm feeling pretty good. I got given paracetamol and ibuprofen to manage the pain and although its sore sometimes, I'm really impressed with how little it has hurt.

 I have another week off in order to heal and recover and also hide away whilst I am unable to wash my hair (it's already looking pretty frightful) and then the week after I have a post-op checkup to check the implant is in place, most likely an xray will be taken. Hopefully then I will get a date for the switch on, hoping it'll be sooner rather than later, I'm excited to start my new hearing journey.

Watch out world, I'm coming.

The Journey To Getting a CI Part 2 By Eleanor

. On Monday just gone I went back to the CI assessment centre for the second time, after being told that based on my audiological results I am eligible for a CI. This time I went for three assessments which were to find out if I'm 'medically fit' to have one.. after making a very sensible (but slightly regrettable at times) decision to get the train and take my bike (which actually saved me a lot of money in car parking and buses) it turned out to be a rather long day.

 With my recent obsession in trying to keep fit in preparation for a half marathon coming up, I decided to bike to the train station. It actually went rather smoothly, until I got to the train station. Apparently people do not like bikes on trains and apparently it makes people rather grumpy, usually accompanied by a roll of the eyes or a tut as they bump into my rear bike wheel as it blocks the aisle entrance. It is also not a good idea to have a bike during peak times. On the journey home I unfortunately had to miss the first train back as lots of tall bikeless people prioritized their journeys before short people with bikes. It didn't bother me too much as I'm rather a patient person but I made sure I was at the front of the queue for the next train, whilst wondering if I could dump the bike and jump on the train if it was too full. All in all, it was a very successful journey and the train station is not far from the hospital at all, perhaps a 10 minute bike ride with excellent cycle paths which make you feel queen of the roads.

 The first assessment was the 'medical'. This was a very short 5 minute conversation with a nurse to check my medical history, if I had been in hospital before, whether I'd had an operation before, whether I was on any medication etc. They also got a lovely swab of my nose which I was told is to test for MRSA. Then, the nurse asked me if I'd had a CT scan of my head before, to which I replied no, so I was sent upstairs to have a CT (how exciting!).

 I'd never had a CT scan before, so it was a rather unnerving experience. You are asked to lie down on, what is best described as a bed but with an appearance of a table. For the CT machine, you're not really allowed any metal things however I'd casually, as most mornings nowadays, did my french braid in my hair that morning complete with frantic metal clips to try and stop it all falling out... so of course they had to come out....afterwards I looked very much like I'd just got out of bed.. so casual. Off came the glasses and the hearing aids, honestly, who knew I had so many things on my head these days.
 Anyway, after a few minutes of lying on the jerky table which couldn't decide if I was coming or going and feeling rather sick from the spinning equipment going around and around my head... it was done. Sadly I didn't get to see the scan of my head which was rather disappointing but I was informed that it was all fine upon inspection.

 There was lots of waiting around between assessments so I decided to find places to hang out and it turns out this hospital has a brilliant food court or 'concourse' as they called it, no idea why. This was great for the waiting around and I had no problems with boredom or hangry feelings.

The second assessment was the 'rehabilitation'. This was a chat with a hearing rehabilitation person, or Speech and Language Teacher (SALT). She was really lovely and keen to know why I wanted a CI, what my motivation behind it is. The process is rather lengthy, for example after the operation I will only have access to one Hearing Aid (HA) on the ear that hasn't been operated on, it will be rather quiet for six weeks until the switch on. For the first few months of the switch on, they recommend not to wear a HA in the other ear, so the brain can adjust to how everything sounds and get used to the different noises. This will mean, whilst they're programming the CI processor, further weeks of 'quiet'. She was keen to inform me that it will be difficult, hard work and a long process. This wasn't to put me off, but to make sure that this is something I really wanted.

 This often plays in my thoughts. Do I really want a CI or am I just looking for some miracle cure that doesn't exist? Being a Teacher of the Deaf and being as fiercely independent as I am, has made me want to do it all myself. I want to be able to hear the children read word for word, to hear their attempts at phonics, to hear when one of them is calling me or talking about their mum's birthday party at the weekend. But most of all, I want to hear my own children. I'm not saying I definitely will have children of my own but perhaps, if one day that happens, I'd like the option. 
 However, I have to be cautious here. I am deaf, and I do like to engage in the deaf community, I can sign and I love meeting deaf people. Wanting a CI doesn't mean I'll turn my back on this, definitely not. I am still me and I will always be deaf. 

The third assessment was 'objective'. This one consisted of a 30 minute nap! This was basically an ABR or Auditory Brainstem Response assessment, which measures the reactions of the nervous system to sounds. I was asked to lie on another bed *cough table cough* with some various 'electrodes' stuck to my forehead, behind both ears and one on my collarbone. Earphones are also put in your ears to play sounds, although I didn't hear anything so it might have all been a lie... For this test you have to be completely relaxed, so it is recommended you sleep or at least shut your eyes for 30-45 minutes. It is a bit surreal attempting to 'nap' whilst knowing someone is in the room next to you and admittedly I didn't really 'nap' I just shut my eyes and tried so hard not to breathe so loudly because the minute you know you have to be quiet is when everything you do is SUPER loud.

 That was the end of the assessments and I was free to go home. The next stage is that all the professionals I've seen are going to meet up and discuss my case and whether they would offer me a CI. So I am basically just waiting for an appointment with the consultant who will let me know the verdict.. hopefully it won't be too long a wait.

 I am ready to be offered one, I think this is a journey I'd like to undertake, but I don't think I'm ready to be not offered one....not when I've come this far.

Watch this space..

Subtitling life - When will Sky catch up? - by Eleanor

Hello!
 So, it may have been a few weeks.. *cough* or months *cough* since writing but its one of those strange things where life just happens and things just bumble along and eventually you find yourself wondering where did that time go. Yep that happened.

 So, I have been meaning to write this post for a few weeks now because I feel this is a really important matter.

 Game of Thrones.

Game of Thrones is back. At long last. Aren't we all so desperate to see what happens to Jon Snow? To Arya? To the poor dragons? And when is that winter coming??

 So, it finally arrives. Sadly I don't have Sky on my TV BUT I have access to Sky Go (basically online catchup of all Sky programs). After waiting with anticipation, I finally settled down to watch it, PJs on with the duvet pulled to my neck.

 IT DOESN'T HAVE SUBTITLES!

What? It must be a mistake? In this day and age? BBC Iplayer, Netflix, 4od, even Amazon prime have subtitles now? I google with frustration.

 'Sky Go does not have subtitles.'

Luckily, someone has already picked up on this and is fighting for equality. Apparently Sky on demand doesn't have subtitles, but they've recently commented on plans to put these on later this year. However, for Sky Go, it won't be until 2017 (see here for more info Sky gives in to deaf teenager's demands to provide subtitles for on-demand programming.)

 I really do wonder how difficult it is to put subtitles on. A few years ago I fought with my local cinema to put subtitles on and I got excuse after excuse about needing digital screens with layering and set legislation to put them on legally. I have no idea how much of this is true and to be honest I should probably look into it further. But why should I? Why should it be my responsibility to ensure that deaf people (there are more than 900,000 in the UK who are severely or profoundly deaf) have access to TV and films? Watching a show without subtitles is like watching something in french (I don't speak french at all). I would not get it. At all.

So, no Game of Thrones till 2017, or with any luck, the boxset *sad face*.

On a more positive note, I have been to see two amazing shows with captions this year. The first was 'Wicked' in London @ #Apollo Victoria Theatre. It was the first time I've ever seen Wicked and I loved it! I was hooked from the first song, 'No one morns the wicked'... *heart melts and mouth drops*.







I also went to see 'The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night Time' @ #Gielgud Theatre, London, with captions too. It was so cleverly written and I enjoyed every minute. The stage, the actors and the technical props, just bang on. The only slight thing I might comment on was that there was a lot of talking, which I knew from reading the book and the fact the main character is autistic, and was to be expected but wow, there was a lot to read! The other awesome thing is that the theatre sent me a synopsis before the show which was a really great idea to help anticipate what would be happening next and therefore be prepared for some of the dialogue. It can often feel like a lot to take in at once, to be reading, watching the show and following it entirely, so having that synopsis fresh in my mind, was really helpful.

I am now utterly hooked on captioned theatre showings and although I've not told anyone yet, I'm hoping all my christmas presents will be tickets to shows next year!

The one with the update from 2015 - By Eleanor

It's been a while since I've written on here. There are several reasons for that; the main one being that in the midst of being a student again and the seemingly never ending assignment writing, I seem to have forgotten about the importance of standing still. For those of you with imaginations like mine, I don't mean literally standing still, I mean taking the time to pause, absorb and take in the sights (with plenty of cake). Life is full of the little treasures that seem to get lost in the rush to grow up.

At 26 years old, you could say I'm grown up now. I don't know about you but I don't think anyone ever feels grown up. I've always felt my mind ages differently to my body and I'm unwilling to let anyone spoil the magic that is my imagination. What fun it is to feel excited about fresh sheets on the bed and hiding underneath when reading a new book (until it gets rather hot and you start worrying when the oxygen will run out). How delightful it is to walk in the woods with your welly-boots on, exploring new paths whilst the sun goes down to create the most extraordinary colours in the sky (until you realise its too dark and the monsters will come out). The delight of walking on the beach on the windiest day known to man, looking under rocks for crabs (till you start fretting that they'll be as big as your head and try to eat you). How wonderfully releasing it is to notice you've become so excited, you've forgotten to breathe in your sentences and commas are non-existent.

 I've been very busy since I last wrote. Decisions were made and thoughts were changed. I am now studying on a one year course PgDip Deaf Education. It basically means I will be qualified to become a Teacher of the Deaf, which as you'll know, is something I really want to be. It is actually one of the best decisions I've made. I'm enjoying the course very much and its brilliant to be in an environment where people have the same goals and motivation in life. We are all striving to give every deaf child the best chance possible. It's also really nice to feel like a strong link in the group. Education has not always been easy for me and I've always found it hard to relate to other students. Whether this is because of communication barriers - 'what if they ask me something I can't hear them?' 'What if I don't know the answer?' 'What if their accent is really difficult to interpret?' 'What if I pronounce something wrong?' 'What if they just don't get me?' - or perhaps just the way nature is, I don't know.
 Yet, finally, I'm with people who feel the same, who can perhaps envision the life I've had and know that it hasn't always been easy, but its mine and I made it what it is. And other children can do the same too with high expectations, lots of support and amazing parents/family around them. I finally feel that this is my field, I know what I'm talking about and I can see clearly now. I can see that I'm not destined to be different, I'm destined to MAKE a difference.

 I just have to be super careful not to spook the monsters under the bed in the meantime.

We've Been Featured!

Back in early July we got an email from the lovely Editor of British Deaf News, Anna asking if we'd like to provide an interview for their August Magazine - we of course jumped up and said we would love to!

Anna came across us and found 'Deafness & Friendships' and 'Is Deafness a Disability?' interesting  and wanted to ask us a little more about them and some other burning questions they wanted to know. We of course love to spark conversation and discuss frankly all matters of our lives and Deafness as many posts of ours have displayed.

One thing I think was apparent during the writing of this interview was how different our opinion was on our 'Disability' and it's something we really love to discuss with you guys because we are different, despite being best friends we do see a variety of opinion between us (although it does have
to be known we agree on near enough everything else) and I think this made it a readable article.

I'm so proud of this and everything that we achieve, it was really great fun to write and even more exciting to see it come through the post in print! It felt very surreal seeing our photo on paper with all our words placed together. It holds a marvellous memory for us both and it wouldn't be possible without you guys reading our posts - so many heartfelt thanks!

It's holding pride of place on my new desk - I can't bring myself to pack it away yet!

Finishing my NQT Year as a Deaf teacher by Eleanor

It's officially SUMMER!

 What a year it has been. It is so funny looking back at my NQT year at this current moment. I know there has been ups and downs and so much of it based on learning what communication works in order for me to be an effective teacher. It's crazy but I've loved it.
 There have been hard times which have often been amplified by fear of the unknown. Not knowing whether I'm a 'good' teacher or the whirlwind of Ofsted. At the time they were difficult, but they were just 'moments'. It is too easy to get hung up on the negative times when there were far more of the positive times and seeing the children learn and progress.

 Working at a SEN school meant that the children and adults were doubly accepting of having a deaf teacher in the classroom and even the parents have been so understanding. I have been so lucky with my TAs in the classroom since January. Even today when the headteacher was talking one of them repeated everything back so I could lipread her. Working as a team is just as important as the work I do solo (planning etc). The kids... the kids have been fantastic, what a brilliant bunch of children and I really wish them the very best for the future.

 What a year. But it is now time for me to move on and progress further in my career as a Teacher of the Deaf. I'm sure I'll keep updating you as time goes on!

 People ask me why I don't cry at times like these. I do feel sad, of course I do, and I will miss everyone but it is just a moment in time. It will pass.
 Life is like a roller coaster. It's full of ups and downs, and every time you go on it, you experience something new or it might go a different way, but it always ends. You might not be happy that its finished, or you might be hysterically happy that you can finally get off, but it always finishes at some point.

 People ask me why am I changing my life so much, why am I moving away?
  Because if you don't buy the ticket, you can't take the ride!! It is a complete life change, but it will be invaluable experience for me to be where I want to be. I want to be a Teacher of the Deaf and inspire young children with hearing loss to be the best they can be. As a youngster I often felt like the world was against me and it's time for deaf children to change their thinking, to be confident, to be pro-active and take control and be whoever they want to be.

 I'm too small an entity to change the world, to make this a place where equal communication happens everywhere. However I can support amazing individuals to seek their own equal access and knock down all communication barriers in order to do so.

 My advice to anyone who wants to become a teacher. Take each day as it comes. When times seem hard just remember they are simply a 'moment'. It will pass, and you will be stronger for it.


If in doubt, just 'let it go' :) .

What I've seen floating around by Imogene

I've recently been seeing 'Deaf' related articles/pictures pop up in all types of scenarios recently and I really like it. There's definitely that instant thought of 'Ooh, I'm one of them!' and you tune in, and they're actually pretty funny, sweet, cringy or damn right odd. (Even if sometimes they're at our expense)

I wanted to share some of the ones I've seen floating around..

What do you think of them?

Is Deafness a Disability? by Imogene

I recently read a comment on a Facebook Deafness page that I follow. People write on there very often sharing tips or asking questions related to a Deaf matter. I follow it because Els sent me a request once to read an article and I've yet to delete it.. not that I have a reason to.

I often find reading other peoples thoughts and feelings on being Deaf really interesting, it seems so many people find so many different degrees of Deafness and love sharing what it means to them. I love this, regardless of saying that I didn't like admitting I was "Deaf" but despite it, I like to know how people view themselves - I have such respect to all them that are very open and honest about their situation. It takes guts to show what can be a weakness to others (and yourself) and see it in the best possible light, it's wonderful and there's definitely something we can all learn from it.

The other day something stood out to me. It was a young girl just throwing a question out for debate and of course many had a opinion to throw in. I watched for a while seeing how this conversation was going to play out and it was really lovely to read so many genuine answers.
The question being:

I have a question, i'd like to think what you think about this question.
Definition of disabled - a physical or mental condition that limits a person's movements, senses, or activities.
So do you (deaf people) class yourself as disabled? ...
& Why do you think the answer?

No nasty comments please thank you!

by Chloe'Lian Fisher

A Deaf Identity - by Eleanor

Being deaf irritates, frustrates, annoys and even pleases me. There are many advantages to being deaf, getting a quiet night sleep, not bothered by irritating noises or even loud noises that would make most people jump out of their skin. It even makes awkward situations easier because you can play the 'deaf card' when all else fails. Take for example, drawing some money out at a cash machine but the well positioned homeless person sitting next to it calls out 'got any change please?'. Potentially awkward.. if you heard them.

 As a deaf child growing up, I never had a deaf role model. I remember being amazed when I saw people with hearing aids. I must have felt alone because my parents always made a point of pointing them out to me, making me feel like they were out there, somewhere in the universe, people just like me. ME. The only child at school with hearing aids and constant 'my granddad wears them' jibes from misunderstood and curious peers.

Now as I continue to grow, I see deaf people more and more because I've chosen to immerse myself in their community, I've set up a signing choir, I volunteer for the NDCS and stay in touch with other volunteers.

The deaf community is small because people take on their deaf identity in different ways. This is often influenced by their parents and how they are brought up. However, this isn't always set in stone. As children grow up, like me, they begin to find their own identity and how they want to be defined.

 For some people, hearing aids are just an aid, they feel they can keep up enough in the hearing world by lipreading and therefore having them, doesn't make them any different to a hearing person. This is probably a good example of how I used to feel, growing up. Even though I knew I missed things, I simply didn't know enough of any other options (British Sign Language for example) to consider otherwise. I'm not saying I wasn't happy, quite the opposite, I was extremely happy and blessed with such a supportive family.
 This identity can also be influenced by rejection from the deaf community or a negative experience which can be as simple as trying to communicate with a fluent BSL user and not being able to understand any of the signs. This almost creates a confirmation in their mind that there are no other options and they can continue to survive (or perhaps thrive depending on their situation) in the hearing world.

For other people, deafness is their identity. They may have a strong deaf family or have been involved with the deaf community from a young age. BSL is their primary language. Some may have tried to interact with the hearing world but had negative experiences or perhaps feel that not many make enough effort to learn their language. They feel at home with other deaf people because they don't have to concentrate 10 times harder and they most definitely don't have to justify themselves to anyone.

 Sometimes, an identity is based on one experience. It can be so difficult to change your thought process when you have a negative experience because your head tells you that's it. A bit like being rejected from someone you love, or for a job. That heart wrenching feeling that someone didn't want you, that you're not good enough and no one could possibly want you again. That human need to be loved, to be appreciated. You could go through life having tens of thousands of positive experiences but its always the one negative that you'll remember in the dead of the night.

 For me, I am proud to be deaf. It is a part of my identity. Admittedly I can't stand it when people know me as 'that deaf one' because that's not all there is to me. Equally I get frustrated when people aren't naturally deaf aware. Why don't people speak clearly naturally? Why don't people move their mouths properly? Why would people want mustaches that cover their lips? Why do people talk across a room? Why do they even need to? Is it meaningful? Why do people have to have group conversations? What's wrong with a 1:1 intimate conversation?

 I think I will always have an inner battle with myself, the girl who doesn't like to step up and tell people to be 'deaf aware' and the girl who embraces being deaf, who enjoys turning her voice off and her hands on.

My first Easter Break as a deaf Newly Qualified Teacher by Eleanor

Admittedly I've never (sorry to all those religious people out there) understood Easter break and why we have two weeks off. Now, as  teacher I truly understand.  Apart from the important side, Jesus dying and coming back to life (and being astounded that some of my children, after reading the story, told me that 'Jesus carried a cross up a hill'), it's the first real opportunity to recharge the batteries. And I've taken full advantage!

 As an NQT I often feel guilty for ever letting my mind slip to other things, for allowing myself to read a non related fiction book about some girl who's in a coma, gives birth and then strange things start happening to her loved ones and then quite literally the world ends and I wonder why I wasted that day on reading a book only to find they were always doomed. This is the stuff that makes me happy. Getting lost in a story that's completely random. Writing, putting words together, making sense of my own thoughts as I type whatever enters my head at that moment.  

  How is it really going as an NQT? Honestly, I love this job. I see so many teachers walking away because it is hard. The amount of administration, the tough Ofsted inspections, the amount of justification necessary on a daily basis and the lack of time to actually spend with the children. Yeah, it is hard. But this is what we signed up for. Not to sound like a cliche but its all about that moment with the children and seeing that light switch on. They can do and can be anything they want to be, and as a teacher we have such a vital role in that journey. It's a beautiful thing.

 As an NQT I have to go through lots of observations, which I quite like because it gives me a chance to get feedback and criticism. A vital part of being a teacher is being able to take criticism and listen to other people's ideas. This is an especially important factor as an SEN teacher, where everyday is completely different. What works one morning might not work the next. Small measures put into place can take months of routine before results are seen. It's always the little things that please me.  

 Seeing children independently match their labels to the independent task boxes as they come in the morning. 

A child independently recalling that this week we are looking at 'baby animals'. 

A child independently going to their choosing board and selecting the object they will receive after their hard work, when for weeks they'd get frustrated and refuse. 

A child independently holding their spoon to put in their mouth (and dropping it straight onto the floor or your lap afterwards). 

Having a child wave to me in the morning as they walk in with the biggest smile on their face. 

 Seeing a non-verbal child repeating all the signs to a song that you've taught them in front of a mirror and giggling the whole time. 

Having a child reach out to take your hand to do something they're scared of, because they trust you.

Hearing a child get excited and repeating the phoneme that they've seen somewhere in the classroom, looking so proud of themselves.

It isn't easy. As a deaf person it's probably a little bit trickier, but it would be too easy to stop, to let the world pass me by just because its 'hard'.
  I didn't chose to be deaf. I chose to become a teacher.  I often look around my classroom to see the children doing something inspirational and I smile to myself, because I am the lucky one.

"I wish I could wear... by Imogene

Hearing Aids”.

My instant response was “No, you really don’t!”

I mean let’s just take a look at it again “I wish I could wear Hearing Aids”. It seems such a silly comment for my 3 year old son to come out with. How did he even come to think of that? 

I know kids ‘say things’ mainly to get a reaction.. Well it certainly made me stop for a second.

There stood my rather mischievous boy, twirling the plastic on the battery pack (that he rather naughtily stole from my handbag), and looking at me like this was the most natural statement to make.

Of course it isn’t.

No one wants to be Deaf. No one asks to be Deaf, we just are and we somehow just deal with it. We don’t want to draw attention to it.

It’s our life and we put our Hearing Aids in because we need to. It's our habit. 

I sometimes very reluctantly want to put them in as I know as soon as I do; I have to get on with the day. Be an Adult and Mum. (Because sometimes it really makes it easier to pretend you’re still asleep when your little one shouts down your ear with none in!)

I had a memory of when Freddie wore some of my lipstick and he applied it pretty impressively; I remember thinking “Why would you think of doing that, you odd sod!” and once I uploaded the photo to Instagram many people gushed over how cute he looked. One of my friends went “aww, that’s so cute! He wants to be just like Mummy! He’s clearly picked up on your tips of applying!” and it instantly made me feel like I was so narrow minded. That I couldn’t see beyond the fact that, I am who he looks up to. He learns from me. He doesn’t see things as Male or Female; just quite simply, an activity that Mummy does. I want to try too!

It made me feel sad, it made me realise that I obviously hadn’t seen that in him. I didn’t notice that he watched me apply my lipstick and found it intriguing.I didn't notice them little eyes open wide with curiosity.

I noticed that he loves me putting moisturiser on his face – why didn’t the two click?

I felt bad for snapping (not out loud, but in my head) and being so negative towards his little declaration. I took a step back with that memory and tried it a different way.

“Why would you want to wear Hearing Aids, though Freddie?”

“Because then I can have my own batteries to put in them”

Welcome to this lad I call my son.

Playing Mum with No Working Hearing Aids.. by Imogene

Hi there again!

I am a Mum to two beautiful young boys (3 & 13 weeks) and they are the centre of my world. Everyday, I am doing things with them, listening to their cries, chants and giggles. They're honestly the most beautiful sounds I hear and I thoroughly appreciate being able to hear them. But what happens on the one day you can't?

Let me explain.
Wednesday last week, I woke as usual to the vibration of Freddie thumping around the bedroom and his (very) high pitched squeal as my hubby is tickling him. It's a normal morning. I sit up and put my hearing aids in and try and hush my lads as my littlest is fast asleep, and well, it's too early to hear such loud noises.
I get up, get dressed and go fetch some breakfast as Noah is still fast asleep. I do love the hectic mornings in this house. It's constantly filled with Freddie shouting he wants more milk with his cereal, or how hubby will be late home that afternoon, or that Noah will want a bottle at 20 past the hour. It's all so normal and it's the thing I wake up to and adore. I like the sound of babbling voices and things lumping around. It's my family.

I however dislike when my hearing aids run out. The tapping really irritates me, and always seem to start at the most inconvenient time! But like everything you tend to do as a parent you just put it to one side and get round to it when you can. My life is busy as a Mum, I'm constantly on the go of feeding and changing, as well as talking and playing. So on the day when one of your hearing aids decides it's finished it's battery life, you think "yeah, OK, I'll change you once I've finish *insert job here*" and this is exactly what I did.
Until my other one decided to start going off too.
Safe to say I rely on my hearing aids A LOT when I'm at home.

Freddie is very much one of them Toddlers that when they want something, they'll want to drag you or keep hanging around the item they want; for example Freddie keeps opening and shutting the pantry door when he wants something to eat. It's probably partly because he's around me most of the time, so knows that will get my attention. Of course he doesn't always do that, he does often shove his face in mine and go "Can I have a biscuit?" "Mummmmmmmmmmmy, I'm huuungry!" or "What time is it? Is it time for Dinner?!"

So on this day my hearing aids were tapping away, driving me up the wall. I had to stop doing everything and find some batteries.
I have many spots around the house and in bags where my battery packs seem to accumulate. In a basket above the microwave, in my handbag, in Noah's changing bag and beside my bedside. I went to all of my usual spots and there were either packets of all used batteries (why these were still here I've no idea!) or there was nothing to find.

Oh Sh*t!

I was a Mum in a house alone with two young, demanding kids and I was completely deaf.
You could imagine how quiet it felt. It felt really odd seeing and looking after my kids but with absolutely no hearing. I managed the best I could and things were OK, I just had to watch everything 10x more than I ever had before. Every move and action had to be accounted for.
A natural thing as a parent is to keep an eye out and look after your child, but there was something about them hours that made me feel like I was doing a terrible job. I know I wasn't really, but it did make me realise that sometimes I rely on my Aids more than I think.

I contacted my mum by text and she tried ringing me, but texting that I can't hear and well, it was a massive miscommunication but finally got to explain that I don't have any batteries!
 As a family we don't have any transport so I couldn't drive to the Hospital, I didn't have any cash on me to get the bus to the Hospital, or a shop to buy any, Chris was at work until 5, which means the shops would be close by the time he finished his shift (not to mention it was 10am in the morning).. It was basically the most annoying situation ever.

My Nan came to my rescue and brought some in Boots for me and brought them to me (Got to love Grandparents who'll do anything for you!). I was saved and all systems were go..
I will never let myself get in that situation ever again. It was hugely frustrating.
It showed me what I am capable of as a Mum, exactly how much I appreciate having Hearing Aids in my life and that I love the sounds my family make. If I didn't have them, I don't know what I'd do!

Oh lah lah, a week in France: By Eleanor

 Sitting on my bed, drink in my hand and my cat wedged firmly between my laptop and lap.

 Home, sweet home.

 Last Thursday I hopped on a plane and flew off to Beziers, Southern France. I still get nervous at the rumbling, speeding plane as it finally lifts off at the front, the back following close behind. The houses, getting smaller and smaller until they look like ants and you find yourself surrounded by fluffy dreamlike clouds. Every now and then the plane dips, you hold your breath, yet the plane smoothly cruises ever onwards.

 Almost too soon and the plane prepares to land and with a bump and a screech, you have arrived at your destination. Bezier is calling. Hand in hand, we explore the land, with a terrible sense of navigation skills plus back to front driving rules equals an extended, hot, sans plomb fuelled drive to our home for the week.

 When we originally started planning our holiday, I made an assumption that lots of people would know English. I am not really sure why I made this assumption and boy has my thoughts changed since then. Lots of people we met spoke fluent French, and although they tried their best, simply did not understand English, same as I simply did not understand French. As a deaf person, I do not cope well with any kind of accent. I remember when I was young, at a theme park and this boy started talking to me and my brother. I couldn't understand a word. I remembering asking him to speak English please. He was completely 100% English, he just had a heavy Yorkshire accent.

That was my first experience with an 'accent' and conversations on that holiday always turned to my curiosity. I became anxious, it was difficult enough for me to understand my family and friends from Norfolk. What would I do if I met someone I couldn't understand? What if I said something stupid? Why did people always talk differently? I became angry, frustrated, I worried that I would always need my mum to interpret (repeat what people have said clearly so I could lip read her). I became very aware of what it looked like to have someone repeating everything that had been said, feeling sad, locked in and dare I say it, lonely.

 We met lots of French people on our travels and came across lots of French writing. My partner tried to teach me some French words but it was difficult to hear the different sounds to pronounce. What I hear, and what is actually said, are two very different things.

 We had an amazing week in France, and like all holidays, it went far too quickly. It was hot. Very hot.
 On the first day we went to cap' de Agde, which had a small beach, an aquarium and quaint cafés. It was a beautiful day, with great company. I had my first strawberry Mojito sans alcohol, with the shimmering, shining blue water stretching out as far as the eyes could see. It was also the first time my partner got red raw sunburn. Whilst I turned a healthy tanned version of myself.

 The next day we headed to Sete, mainly for an art gallery by Miro. I love art galleries. We did get lost trying to find it though, the theme of getting lost runs heavily during the week.

 The next day, was Sunday. Which is considered a rest day in France. And we considered it our rest day too. We went to a market in the morning in Bessan, and brought some amazing fresh strawberries, we also went to the bakery for fresh croissants (when in France!). I honestly could not go back to supermarket croissants now... it has to be fresh, simply amazing. It also gave us the chance to explore the local area. I encountered my first conversation with a French person who could speak good English. The problem was, I couldn't lip-read. The mouth movements were different, from her native language being French. It was interesting but similar emotions started creeping in.
Its not that I don't want to know what they are saying but it is painful. I've become somewhat of an expert at knowing when to smile, nod, murmur some sort of noise to allow them to think I understand what is going on. Asking someone to repeat something that you still won't understand, even after the fifth attempt, is an awkward and frustrating process for both sides. It is so difficult to explain to people that because I've heard them once before the first time, it doesn't mean I will always hear them the first time. Lip reading is and always will be my proudest achievement, but it is not magic. It does not allow me to instantly recognise every word.

It is like a jigsaw puzzle.
You pick a jigsaw (conversation starter) based on your mood, what you feel you can achieve (topic you know enough about), the number of pieces (number of people in the conversation), the size of the pieces (the other people in the conversation, their ability, can they speak clearly enough to lip read).
 This is good, because you are in control. Once you've had a go, you let someone else have a turn. The problem is, they have different tactics (ideas), they mess up your system, you no longer know what is being done (or said). It takes time for you to work out what they have done, the gaps they have filled (words they have said). And sometimes you don't always know every gap they have filled.
 It is a slow process, working together to piece the whole jigsaw together. You get there, and more often than not, there is still one piece missing. The connection doesn't feel as natural, as strong as others. Other people can walk into a room, say something in passing and make everyone laugh. The kind of connection you get from throwing words around.

The rest of the week was full of further exploring, including a visit to grotto clamouse (a cave). This visit really excited me because the brochure we found about this, was translated into English as well. It even commented on having access for deaf people. This was the first cave trip that I had ever been on that actually felt they prided themselves on equal communication. The first part was a video, it was spoken in French and had French subtitles at the bottom. It also had English subtitles at the top (yay!). We had explained that I was deaf when entering and they said I could have a copy of what was said during the tour (more surprised smiles) so I could read it. To be honest, it was full of technical jargon and even when reading it, it went completely over my head. The best part about exploring caves, is exploring caves. For me, I don't need any explanation or technical words, I want to see the beauty for myself. And it was beautiful. And I loved the opportunity to feel equal.

 Of course, as with all good holidays, it was soon time to go home. I loved my trip to France and will always remember never to make an assumption that all French people speak English. :)

A muffled world, my week with one hearing aid: By Eleanor

 This week has been particularly tough. Not in the usual format of being on placement, assignment work etc. (its half-term whoo) but in the fact that one of my ear moulds has been causing me a lot of pain recently, constantly rubbing to make sores in my left ear.


 It has got to the point where I am coming home and taking it straight off. As a person that has grown up dependant on these machines to communicate it has been strange.


 Today I had to go to the UEA to do a 'viva voce' to pass the remaining assignment. I worried about attending with just the use of one hearing aid, knowing that it is really quite disorientating and that I can only realistically listen to one person at a time who is facing me. I considered wearing my hearing aid just to avoid any issues. But then I started to wonder, how would they cope if I did lose my hearing further, if I couldn't rely on my hearing aids any longer, and more to the point, how would I cope?... so I went without.

 But actually, I didn't need to worry. I explained to my tutor and she actually made a point of swapping positions to be sat on my 'better side'. She spoke clearly, not treating me like an idiot (you know the 'caaaan yoooooou heeeeaaaarrrr meeeeee?' version). She said if the other person in the room would ask me anything then she would indicate this was so, knowing that they were sat on my 'deaf side'. It really made me feel more secure and safer, not just in those 30 minutes but for the rest of my day. I spend the day with Imz (one of my best friends) and although we were in the busy city centre, I wasn't distracted by anything (mostly because I couldn't hear much of anything) but I could focus, I could listen, I could lip-read, I could speak, I could communicate. I'm not saying that if were was more than one friend, that I would have been able to cope but I really surprised myself.

The ones that matter don't mind and the ones that mind don't matter.

 On my way home Imz had left one of my old favourites in the CD player, with just one hearing aid in, I cranked up the sound to the max and belted out the lyrics, feeling the vibrations through the floor and reciting those lyrics from those thousands of times we practised when we were young. It made me smile, so much. Thank you (Imz, I love you :) ).


 In some ways it has made me so appreciative of the life that my mum and dad brought me up in, they encouraged me to speak rather than sign. This has made me really good at adapting to situations, by lip-reading and fitting in the missing bits (it often still goes wrong when I don't know the context!), and quite probably TOO good because some assume that I can talk so I can hear leading to another world of pain and communication breakdowns.
Sometimes I wish my signing was as fluent as my speaking, however it has enabled a bigger, accessible world, ensuring that I can associate with hearing people. This world is predominately a hearing world, and always will be.


It is estimated that 1 in 1000 people are deaf. This means that there are ALOT more hearing people, speaking, talking, chatting with their backs turned, talking from another room, mumbling down the phones, whispering secrets, singing along to lyrics, sharing stories, every minute of every day of every week of every year. A life with working ears, taken for granted, hearing and absorbing. Of course I can understand not knowing, not seeing and not understanding a world with broken ears.


  Sure, I still get frustrated at the lack of deaf awareness but quite often it is fixable with knowledge and communication. I want to fight for equal access, be it in the form of subtitles in cinemas, on TV, on the train, for any and all announcements. I want to fight for sign language to be a GCSE option, I want to fight for all companies to have and to use access to emails and live online chats rather than phone calls. I want to fight to enable that no deaf child feels they don't know which world they belong in. But I (and probably many other deaf people) have heard the same things, reached the same brick walls, same boundaries time and time again.


My energy falls, my enthusiasm and motivation to continue the fight often waivers. I celebrate at LoveFilm finally agreeing to subtitle more contents, but the fight goes on, directed for Sky next. I celebrate at getting my local cinema to show subtitled screenings once a month, but I despair at no-one using them.

 One day it will all be gone, and people will moan, but they didn't use it when it was there. These changes will be those failed movements of time that no-one opened their eyes or closed their ears to see. 

Starting Norfolk Signing Choir: By Eleanor

My First Signing Choir

 

Ever since I’ve been learning to sign I’ve become more and more absorbed in the ‘deaf world’. As well as using BSL with my communicator in the classroom, I’ve also been teaching signs to the young children as I continue through my PGCE training. Just a few weeks ago I finished at my first placement school and we had to perform an end-of-term play. Being in a reception class, this meant that the majority of the play was with singing which turned out to be a complete delight. I can’t sing myself and it is something I refuse to do unless I’ve got alcohol in my system.

 

 The reason the school play songs were an absolute delight was because it gave me the chance to sign along to the songs. I half expected the children not to be too bothered, and to be fair, not all of them were enthused about signing as I was but some of them completely surprised me. The amount of practising we did (mainly for singing rather than the signing aspects) was crazy, the amount of ‘quick ten minutes’ here and ‘super quick five minutes’ there was mad. It got to the point where I was in a classroom supervising break-time and I could see a young girl signing all the songs without the music, without singing to her friends. It was a heart-skipping moment, and if I watched her any longer I may have shed a tear. It was so beautiful to see these hearing children open their eyes and heart to sign language.

 

 It made me remember a time when I used to love singing in school, however badly and out of tune I was, it really didn’t matter when you were 4 or 5. It made me think about watching people on YouTube sign along to music, particularly the infamous Lee and really wanting to be a part of that. I was talking to my communicator about how much I really wanted to be a part of a signing choir and it was difficult with the limited amount of choirs in this area. I know there is one in Kings Lynn but they get together at awkward times for me. I wanted a choir where it didn’t matter if you didn’t know sign language, where it didn’t matter how old you were – because those children that I taught in a reception class were amazing and so motivated to join in. That love and passion for something quite often dies away as you get older, yet when you’re a child, the magic lasts forever, no matter how many times you repeat a song.

 

 My communicator (Claire) really surprised me with her response. She said ‘Why don’t you make your own?’ I was really taken aback by this, how could I make my own? I’m not an expert in BSL and at the best of times I use SSE (Sign Supported English) more so than BSL. How would I be able to know when to start a song, if I forget the words I can’t pick it up again by listening to the music, how could it possibly work?

 A few days passed and I mentioned that I was still thinking about this, how I could possibly make my own Signing Choir and she surprised me yet again by saying how she would love to start one up too, perhaps we could work together. The conversation instantly changed from how would it work, to how could we attract people? I no longer had the worry of translating because I knew I had her support no matter what, and from first-hand experience, I knew that she would be my cue when I forget the words or I miss the start of the lyrics.

 

 From that, Norfolk Signing Choir was born. I have to point out that it is REALLY early days but I am so happy. I designed a flyer and posted it on Facebook to every deaf group that I’m a part of, I started looking at sign song videos on YouTube to see how others were doing it and thinking what songs could we do. I started telling people, no matter who they were, hoping that they would pass the message through. I started enquiring about where we could have these meetings. I am so lucky for Charley South and her kind offer of using the Brickmakers Pub in Norwich.

 

 Yesterday, Saturday 3^rd May was the day of the first practise. I was really nervous because I wasn’t sure if anyone was coming. Quite often, people want to come but can’t make it, or are very nervous about coming to the ‘first’ event. So, I was so happy to see some new faces come through the door! Claire is our ‘conductor’ and we had a fab time learning part of a song. We didn’t manage to finish a song, but for the first event we did fabulously! I really, really enjoyed myself and that was what my aim for this Signing Choir was/is. From other comments, it seems that everyone else enjoyed it too! Thank you guys, for coming and joining in, and I can't wait to practise the rest of the song :)

 

 We are now in the stages of planning our next meeting, I don’t want to say any dates until we are absolutely sure but we are planning on having a practise once a month every month on Saturday at 2pm finishing around 3.30pm. Please, come and join in, we are open to all ages, all abilities and all sense of humours!! Find us on facebook @ Norfolk Signing Choir.

 

Boo! by Imogene

Hello!!

Long time no speak... literally!

(sorry for the post title, but couldn't think of one that goes, but it's amusing all the same!)

I firstly want to apologise for the lack of posting for well, months now. I've been really really busy with well, everything; but mostly my little family, which I would like to say has had an addition to, in the last couple of weeks!

So, I've rather had my hands full with my new little guy :) Oh, and not to mention Freddie too!

Ok, so I've got a massive confession to make - I've been cheating on this Blog with another! I've got a personal 'family' blog that I have been heavily involved with in the last few months.. and its slowly become to show that I've neglected this one - I'm very sorry!

I mainly started my other blog because I felt I never had enough to say for this one that was Deaf related as my family are literally, as sad as it sounds, is all I do. I hardly ever have many Deaf stories to share.. Which I think is kinda a good thing.. Shows that my hearing doesn't take over the majority of what happens in my daily life. (That really isn't in any way meant to sound patronising and offensive to any other deaf persons)

However, on this rare occasion, I do have a little something deaf related that I can share with you.

For the last few months I've been off to the Hospital for check ups on my Diabetes (as well as bump). I've been lucky to be able to have quite a few scans too, so it's not all been bad but there was a particular day that wasn't joyful or a planned event.

When I was 36+6 weeks pregnant I woke up and found some bleeding. Naturally this really worried me and I was terribly panicked that it could mean that something was going wrong with #2 (Noah as he is now). I rang my mum and she told me it could be the 'show' as they call it, but to make sure I rang my midwife.

I'm so glad that my midwife that I've had all along answered the phone (I also had her for my monthly check ups with Freddie too!) and she tried calming me and asked me to explain and tell her what had happened and what I found.. I explained it all and she told me to ring the Hospital to get checked out - simply to make sure everything was alright!

The funny thing that she said (it's funny now, not really at the time) was "Imogene, make sure when you go to the Hospital and see them that you tell them that you're Deaf! Because you don't always hear things right and it isn't obvious that you are.. I don't want you saying 'Yes' to something you don't hear"

Thinking back on it, it's such a true statement. I never tell people I'm Deaf. I'm not really sure why.. probably because I'm usually not too bad without telling them, but also because (as stupid as it sounds) I sometimes forget I'm actually Deaf! It sounds so laughable and really, it is but I occasionally do forget.

My mum comes to the appointments with me and very often goes 'Oh, Imz is Deaf, so if she doesn't reply or looks confused it's probably because she didn't hear you' (because I never normally mention it!) and then the same old comments come out 'Oh are you? I never realised' 'Ooh, you don't sound like you're Deaf, your speech is very normal' and 'You don't look Deaf, you're very attentive and reply quick, do you lipread?'

These comments always make me laugh. Writing them down does seem like you should take offense to what they say because it sounds rude. But I'm so open about it, I don't mind people having a say on it - at least it's not said behind my back or in whispers!

Anyhow, everything was fine. There was no explanation for the bleeding, just that it happens sometimes, but there was no sign of any other further bleeding.

I didn't have a fantastic birth, but it happened and little man arrived here at last!

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www.littleandbigmoments.blogspot.co.uk

Oh dear.. the baby monitors gone!

Hey there everyone!
Long time no posting - I know! It's just I feel I can only really blog here when I have something major to talk about (yeah, not completely what blogging is all about) but there's nothing massively Deaf related going on in my life, which I'm pleased to say actually! But tonight I have come up with something that does have a slight line in that direction.. and probably many parents will be able to relate to this new change I'm experiencing!

Now Freddie is coming up to being 3, we've finally decided to let go of using the baby monitor as the little guy is more than capable of walking and opening doors (he has more than proven this when he was very ill! - which I'm pleased to say he has made a full recovery.. finally!). Non-the-less as a parent this is such a scary thing! It does bring a little worry as to whether I shall hear him if I'm downstairs etc, but I know in my heart he can call and come down un-aided and let me know of any problems.. 2nd night of this and it's successful.. (I still go to grab it once he's in bed to realise he's not using it no more!). It's just showing how independent he is growing and just how much I am able to trust him to come and find me. 
However, in the night my husband does most of the interacting, partly because my hearing aids are out and it's practically impossible to lipread half asleep (I've tried it so many times and have just given up, even my husband gets a 'what?' about 20 times before I get it... my brain, eyes and everything doesn't co-operate when tired!). Also doesn't help that I'm such a deep sleeper, although not so much at the current moment as pregnancy is taking it's toll on my diabetes! (but that's completely going off topic!)
So yeah, he's growing up so quick now.. And I have to admit when the husband said 'Do we really need the baby monitor plugged in anymore? We hardly need or use it really, do we?' I instantly was like 'BUT.. WHAT!?' but like he said we hardly need it and until #2 comes around we really don't need it - It's just like having your safety blanket taken away from you for the mean time! I'll only need it in the evenings and during naptimes with #2, so it's not a massive loss at the moment.. (But it's still scary right?!)

Would love to hear how any of you Deaf parents/friends of Deaf parents coped with or what stories you have heard on this subject! It's always nice to hear about other people's experiences.. means that we don't feel quite isolated in these subjects!

I hope you're all well! :) Ix