Boo! by Imogene

Hello!!

Long time no speak... literally!

(sorry for the post title, but couldn't think of one that goes, but it's amusing all the same!)

I firstly want to apologise for the lack of posting for well, months now. I've been really really busy with well, everything; but mostly my little family, which I would like to say has had an addition to, in the last couple of weeks!

So, I've rather had my hands full with my new little guy :) Oh, and not to mention Freddie too!

Ok, so I've got a massive confession to make - I've been cheating on this Blog with another! I've got a personal 'family' blog that I have been heavily involved with in the last few months.. and its slowly become to show that I've neglected this one - I'm very sorry!

I mainly started my other blog because I felt I never had enough to say for this one that was Deaf related as my family are literally, as sad as it sounds, is all I do. I hardly ever have many Deaf stories to share.. Which I think is kinda a good thing.. Shows that my hearing doesn't take over the majority of what happens in my daily life. (That really isn't in any way meant to sound patronising and offensive to any other deaf persons)

However, on this rare occasion, I do have a little something deaf related that I can share with you.

For the last few months I've been off to the Hospital for check ups on my Diabetes (as well as bump). I've been lucky to be able to have quite a few scans too, so it's not all been bad but there was a particular day that wasn't joyful or a planned event.

When I was 36+6 weeks pregnant I woke up and found some bleeding. Naturally this really worried me and I was terribly panicked that it could mean that something was going wrong with #2 (Noah as he is now). I rang my mum and she told me it could be the 'show' as they call it, but to make sure I rang my midwife.

I'm so glad that my midwife that I've had all along answered the phone (I also had her for my monthly check ups with Freddie too!) and she tried calming me and asked me to explain and tell her what had happened and what I found.. I explained it all and she told me to ring the Hospital to get checked out - simply to make sure everything was alright!

The funny thing that she said (it's funny now, not really at the time) was "Imogene, make sure when you go to the Hospital and see them that you tell them that you're Deaf! Because you don't always hear things right and it isn't obvious that you are.. I don't want you saying 'Yes' to something you don't hear"

Thinking back on it, it's such a true statement. I never tell people I'm Deaf. I'm not really sure why.. probably because I'm usually not too bad without telling them, but also because (as stupid as it sounds) I sometimes forget I'm actually Deaf! It sounds so laughable and really, it is but I occasionally do forget.

My mum comes to the appointments with me and very often goes 'Oh, Imz is Deaf, so if she doesn't reply or looks confused it's probably because she didn't hear you' (because I never normally mention it!) and then the same old comments come out 'Oh are you? I never realised' 'Ooh, you don't sound like you're Deaf, your speech is very normal' and 'You don't look Deaf, you're very attentive and reply quick, do you lipread?'

These comments always make me laugh. Writing them down does seem like you should take offense to what they say because it sounds rude. But I'm so open about it, I don't mind people having a say on it - at least it's not said behind my back or in whispers!

Anyhow, everything was fine. There was no explanation for the bleeding, just that it happens sometimes, but there was no sign of any other further bleeding.

I didn't have a fantastic birth, but it happened and little man arrived here at last!

To read or follow my family life feel free to become a follower/share my Blog - do say Hello too! :)

www.littleandbigmoments.blogspot.co.uk

Getting Ready for Baby #2 by Imogene

I remember when I was first expecting my first son, I was so shocked but also so happy to learn that I was going to be starting a family. It's one of the things I have always wanted and expected that I would have eventually. I have grown up in a big family with 2 brothers and a sister, I also have another half sister. Having such great memories of my childhood and being blessed with amazing relationships with my parents - it's always brought such positive ideas about my own family that i'd have one day.

Naturally I'm quite a laid back person (obviously I have the worry/stress days as well as anyone!) and I found that through-out my first pregnancy I reflected this temperament. I didn't have many worries about whether he could potentially have a disability or anything could go wrong. I think most of that was because of my age, I was only 19 at the time. Also it's probably because I didn't know what to expect being a parent and that the pregnancy didn't become to feel real till I felt my son kick for the first time. It hit me really hard, I was going to actually be a mum. I did have the general little doubts of whether I would be a good mother, know what he needed when he cried, whether i'd cope with the late nights, that I may drop him.. It was really scary, but I was so excited to meet him, despite the doubts. My Husband at the time was in the RAF so I was still at home with my parents but we got married, moved into our own home and even though Chris (husband) was working away most of the time I stayed in our house alone, so most of the time it was just me and Freddie. Through them few months we bonded as he was the other person to talk to through that time - I also went home and saw my family etc but most of the time it was just us. I used to read to him, listen to music and of course nesting ready for his arrival! 

So when he arrived he was already my everything because he's been there a whole 9 months and we only got closer. Now he's nearly 3 and he's still a mummys' boy.

When Freddie got to be a Year Old, both me and my Husband decided we'd like to try for another baby, because we always talked about having a few children and we wanted Freddie to have someone to play and grow up with from an early age. 

Me and my siblings are 2 years apart and I remember the fun and games we used to have from a young age. Being to be able to have other siblings to play with was fantastic, I simply couldn't imagine being an only child.. couldn't imagine how different my life would've been.

It took over a year to finally get pregnant again (the more you seem to want something the more it sometimes seems to get out of reach!) but we did! Currently at 26 weeks and due at the end of April. I'm so excited to meet our other little man, it seems surreal that it's so close. 

It surprised me that during this pregnancy I have thought of all the bigger worries of having a child (the ones you would've suspected me to have first time around!), like him having a disability or a health problem, whether he's happy or not inside me. When I went to the anomaly scan at 20 weeks, I was incredibly nervous and felt sick - I never had this with Freddie but this time it hit me that during pregnancy you don't actually know what's going on inside of you; you know that they're developing into this beautiful human but everything else, you have no knowledge of. People always ask you 'How are you? Are you and bump OK? Is he well?' and when you've not had a scan since 12 weeks, the only thing you can think is 'well yes, i'm good, and I suppose they are too' which is a little scary as a mother to be. So many of my thoughts are a by product of maturing and from being a mother to a energetic lad. I always want the best for Freddie and for 'Archie' and knowing how well Freddie has developed I can only hope and wish that Archie shall be the same. It has also been a bit of a comfort to have regular scans due to being type 1 diabetic where they reassure me that all of his developing is fantastic and everything is really normal. I've been a lot less concerned since the 20 week scan as I know if there was a major issue they would've picked up on it (I have to hope!). It has also been really nice that one of my best friends is pregnant as well, she's a week behind at 25 weeks and it's been lovely to be able to text and meet; talking all things babies and pregnancy. A few times now we've had conversations of 'do you have it where you feel really sick if you bend down?' and it's like 'OMG YES!' - it's nice to know, it's all normal and happens to everyone else too!

This pregnancy has been different compared to my last. Archie has been a lot quieter in his movements compared to Freddie, I have to say that's the biggest difference, but then he probably has a lot to listen to what with Freddie and me talking constantly! I have also had more heartburn and earlier than I did during the last pregnancy. I've also been able to sleep better than last time - I rarely get woken up or feel unsettled - Freddie loved to kick me awake in the early hours!

Shows how different their personalities may be?
I have also been reading a book called 'The Secret Life of the Unborn Child' and it really opened my eyes to how much influence our mind has over the development and general psychology of our little people. It's an amazing book and anyone who is expecting should read it.

As I mentioned earlier that my Freddie is a big mummy's boy that I did wonder how he would behave and react towards having a brother and it's been very positive! I talk to him about when Archie is awake and what he's doing, I show him the scan pictures, I show him all his clothes and everything that we have got him so far. I make him feel included and he seems fairly happy with the idea of saying he's a big brother, kissing and hugging my bump (maybe doing that as it's seen what to do by daddy) and that Archie will be a baby - I guess the real impression will happen once he's born. But how he is generally I feel he'll be fine and that he'll love him (maybe not at being woken up in the middle of the night possibly) but I suppose he's too young to really grasp the whole picture and know what to expect, maybe he will when #3 comes!

The Perks of Being a Wallflower: Film Review by Imogene

The Perks of Being a Wallflower

Directed: Stephan Chbosky

Starring: Logan Lerman, Emma, Watson, Paul Rudd, Johnny Simmons, Ezra Miller, Dylan McDermott, Kate Walsh, Nina Dobrev

Genre: Drama, Romance

Stars: 5/5

(Contains Spoilers)

I have to say for this actual film, I was never particularly bothered about seeing it upon its release, but after hearing it’s “film of the year” for 2012 and was highly rated by many sites and reviews – I decided to add it to my LoveFilm list. When it came through the post I was eager to watch it, to simply understand the hype for it. I have to say I was not at all disappointed. From the moment it started, till it finished, I was hooked!

The film starts with showing us Charlie (Logan Lerman) at a desk in his room on the eve of attending high school. He’s writing a letter to an unknown pen pal sharing his worries for the days and term ahead. Feeling like he’s not going to make friends, he just attends lessons and keeps his head down for the best part. He befriends his teacher Mr. Anderson (Paul Rudd) who picks up on his great abilities on English Language and starts giving him added assignments.

Charlie attends a school football game alone one evening and sits near the flamboyant Patrick (Ezra Miller). As they start to enjoy the game Sam (Emma Watson) joins with them and at that moment Charlie is hit by Sam’s beauty. He becomes acquainted to the pair and heads home in high spirits, only to arrive home to witness his sister Candance being attacked by her boyfriend. Charlie is nerved by this as his Aunt got abused by her partners before she died so he goes to help her only for her to swear him to secrecy from their parents.

At a homecoming party Charlie is stood alone around the edge of the hall, seeing his sister with her boyfriend he goes joins Patrick and Sam. After the homecoming he goes with them to a house party, there he meets Mary Elizabeth, Alice and Bob. He also gets to meet Sam’s boyfriend Craig and is instantly jealous. Bob encourages Charlie to eat a pot brownie (which he had no idea was one) and as he gets high all the party members are amused by the stuff he says. Sam saves his from total embarrassment as he says he want a strawberry milkshake and takes him to the kitchen where he compliments her on her eyes and then tells her about the death of his best friend. He then leaves the kitchen to go upstairs to the toilet and accidentally walks in on Patrick with Brad (Johnny Simmons) kissing. Patrick is panicked as Brad doesn’t want their relationship to get out (as his father doesn’t approve) and makes him promise he’ll never repeat what he saw. He agrees not to say anything. Sam meanwhile is left shocked and goes speaks to Patrick saying she doesn’t think he has any friends – they both welcome him with open arms into the group.

 

(Sam through the Tunnel)

Whilst they both drive Charlie home, an unknown song comes up on the radio and tells Patrick to drive through the tunnel, where she gets in the back of the pick up truck and waves her arms around. Charlie again is completely stunned by her natural beauty.

Sam doesn’t do too well in tests so in the coming months up to Christmas, Charlie says he would help her revise. At Christmas all the friends participate in a “Secret Santa” gift exchange. On the last night of the exchange Sam takes Charlie up to her room to show him, her gift – A typewriter. Charlie is wowed by this present. They start talking about first kisses and she shared that her first kiss was by her father’s boss who molested her in her younger years. He tells Sam that he’s never kissed anyone before and she says she want his first kiss to be by someone who loves him and the pair end up kissing.

On Charlie’s birthday he has flashbacks of his Aunt Helen who died in a car accident that same night after getting him a present. At a new years party he takes a LSD and has many flashbacks of the things that happened surrounding Aunt Helen's death and their relationship together, he gets found passed out by the police.

After being dismissed he attended a party with the gang and had Mary Elizabeth as a partner to the dance, they end up going back to her house and making out – she then announces he’s her boyfriend now. Charlie doesn’t really like her like that and ends up going along with it because he doesn’t know how to break up with M-E without hurting her feelings, but has no interest in her neediness. Whilst at a party with the gang they play truth or dare, Patrick on Charlies turn dares him to kiss the prettiest girl in the room, and everyone assumes he’d go for Mary Elizabeth but he jumps out at Sam. The pair is angry with what he did and Patrick tells him to give it time before approaching the group again.

 

(Charlie kisses Sam in the Dare)

Being back to being alone again, Charlie starts to isolate himself and the memories of Aunt Helen worsen. After meeting with Bob, Charlie finds out that Brads father found out about Brad and Patrick's relationship. He tries to talk to Patrick only for him to tell him to leave him alone for the moment. Brad is seen with a massive bruise on his face and tells people a wrong tale as to why he got the mark. Patrick walks by Brads table at lunch and he calls him a faggot – then the pair end up fighting on the cafeteria floor. Charlie intervenes and tells them to back off his friends.

Patrick is heartbroken that he and Brad had to end their relationship and ends up getting closer to Charlie. After they've been spending a lot of time together Patrick one night tries to kiss Charlie. With no reaction Patrick bursts into tears and apologises. Sam ends her relationship with Craig as she finds out he cheated on her 3 times.

Sam gets through to Graduation and is off to Penn State. After her leaving party, Charlie helps Sam pack her items up. Wondering why he never asked her out as she’s liked him, and talked of Craig and the relationship there she asked why does she always fall for people that aren’t good for her and Charlie replies “We accept the love we think we deserve”, after some more confessions the pair end up kissing and is stopped when she rubs the inner thigh, but resumes after he mentioned that it wasn’t anything that made him stop.

The next day he watches Sam leave for college and is feeling upset. Going home he receives more flashbacks of his repressed memories of Aunt Helen who used to abuse him as a young boy and ends up calling Cadence saying it was his fault she’s dead. Getting the police to the house so that Charlie couldn’t harm himself, before he could they got to him and he blacked out.

We then see him in a hospital confused as to why he’s there. The Doctor tells his parents of the damage that his Aunt did and that the reasons for his breakdowns were because of repressed memories. On being discharged Sam and Patrick meet with Charlie and go to a restaurant. On leaving Sam says she found out the name of the song that was playing when they first went through the tunnel together. Charlie gets in the back of the truck this time and screams on his way out of the tunnel.

I adored this film and like I said at the start I was hooked from the moment I turned it on to the moment the credits rolled. I’m glad it was a long film as I don’t think I would’ve been satisfied with it only being an hour long. The plot had plenty of room to develop and it did develop in an even pace which was perfect for this genre. There were no moments that I felt it was rushed – I got everything I wanted from the storyline.

I really liked Charlie’s character and loved the way he was portrayed as shy and nervous, it brought real depth to the film and the character. It also was lovely to see him grow more confident throughout the film. It was his story and it was well documented – I want to read the book now.

The whole crew was fantastic, it was especially nice to see not all well recognised cast members as it allowed there to be interest in how the character shall be played. I have to say it’s now one of my favourite films and shall enjoy watching once again someday!

I have given it a 5/5 because I felt it was very mysterious and gripping film, it was very interesting all round, there was never a moment where I felt like I was loosing interest or wondering what was going on – fabulous film!

A Family Wedding: By Eleanor

 So, I was lucky enough to get invited to my beautiful cousin’s (and his bride!) wedding. Set in the middle of June, you’d be expecting lovely weather too. Well you’re not too far off, add a few showers which happened to time themselves when the photos were planned and you’d be right. Luckily the weather cleared up and we *touch wood* got some lovely photos.

 The wedding itself took place at Dragon’s Hall in Norwich, gorgeous building. Just enough place to hold everyone you love, or to quote Sam during his speech ‘It’s so rare these days to have everyone I care about in at one time’.

 Unfortunately, the building and the amount of people didn’t have great prospects for hearing. It is always daunting when I’m put into a room with lots of people I don’t know, and some I do. It’s even worse when the room is full of noise. Family conversations were impossible, and there were plenty of awkward silences as we realised breakdown of communication. I asked my mum if it were just me that struggled to hear, but she said that my uncle Neville had problems with his ears and Sam himself had an ear infection so I wasn’t the only one! She did also say it was difficult in there for, well, hearing people.

 The ceremony itself was exactly as I anticipated, simple and formal, just like Sam and Sophie (the bride) would like. Sophie’s dress was beautiful, not too over the top as I’ve often seen at weddings. It was clear that they love and care about each other very much which was sublime. I’ll admit I didn’t hear much of the two readings that different family members read out, but I’m sure they were just as pretty too. The vows were spoken and the pair were married at last!

 We then went back downstairs for the photos, which consisted of waiting around being offered delightful tasty offerings and champagne. My brother told me that there was a rainbow outside so I said ‘no’ and signed rainbow to him. I then started to sign ‘I can see a rainbow’ and asking what the next line was. This then resulted in my brother asking people, my nan asking people. Nan insisted that there was a line with colours in and asked me how I’d sign that. I explained I’d sign all the different colours and showed her a few, red, pink, blue etc. She seemed really excited about it all and encouraged my cousin Jack’s girlfriend Kristina to join in. Later, during the meal, Jack asked us if we wanted to read his lesson plan, which he had converted into his best man speech with his actual speech on the back of it. I started to read the back until my brother took it off me and told me to wait. I said I probably wouldn’t hear it anyway so I’d like to read it. My mum suggested Jack could sign it to me, but I am the only family member who actually knows any sign. Kristina piped in and signed pink and blue as I had shown her earlier. Everyone looked impressed. It was a sweet gesture, but sometimes it really disheartens me that no-one in my family know sign. It would really benefit me, I know I’m not fluent but even to just have Sign Supported English (SSE) or clear lip patterns would ensure I’m always included.

After the amazing buffet styled meal and the oh-so-good desert it was time to move onto the speeches. Unfortuntely I couldn’t really tell you what they were about. The first one, was done by Sophie’s dad (he seemed a lovely bloke). I only got bits and pieces, something about Sophie going to Africa and then something about Sam. It seemed very warming and everyone seemed to like it. The second speech was by Sam, which was lovely, I understood most of it. It was about meeting Sophie and thanking his family and then everyone else that had come to the big day. Then it was the turn of the best men (both his brothers). Jack did a lovely speech about how Sam was his best friend and the things they did growing up. He wished love and happiness for the young couple. Then it was Leon who I didn’t really understand. I asked if I could read the draft speech paper that he’d been reading off. When I read it, it was beautiful, a clear big brother role with embarrassing stories, including a brown log shaped toy that appeared in one of the baths they used to share.

After the speech I was lucky enough to have my boyfriend join me for the evening party when the band came on and the free bar got flowing. I find it strange when bands play, I don’t quite know what to do with myself. I can never seem to really dance unless I’m holding someone’s hand, and usually with rather a lot of alcohol in my system. To me, it just sounds like noise. I can’t hear the words, or the different instruments and I have no idea how to move my body to appropriate sounds. Everyone else on the other hand let themselves lose and had a good boogie! As my boyfriend says ‘I like a good dance, it’s good for the soul!’ It was lovely to see everyone dancing and enjoying themselves. Often, I find it more fun to watch than actually attempt to dance myself!

 During the night, I found moments where I realised I’d lost that connection I’d had with my cousins years ago. Back in the days when I’d stay over at my nans with my cousin and we’d giggle about sharing a big double bed together and planned menus to draw up for when the whole family came round. It made me think of times the whole family would be together and we’d play Trivia Pursuit or card games. I vaguely remember bingo making an appearance too. I know that life consists of paths and the further we follow a path, the harder it is to come back and remember those that helped you get there. It’s difficult to find the time to keep friendships going, and being aware of your common interests to help those conversations flowing.

 On the bright side, I was really happy that I managed to talk to my uncle Neville during the night. We talked about lots of different things including photography, sign language (where he proceeded to sign the whole alphabet) and he said he’d read my blog which was really sweet. He could understand where I was coming from with listening to bands, and it was just really nice to still have that connection with that side of my family. Thank you Neville, you really made my nightJ.
 I also got to play life sized Jenga against my brother, I lost the first game but it was totally worth it as he happened to be standing where it was falling. I don’t know if he was more worried about himself or his drink in his hand! And, to make it better, I won the second game.

 Thank you Sam and Sophie for inviting me to be a part of your big day, after all that waiting and preparation it finally arrived and it was sublime. I send you lots of love and good health wishes on your newly married life together. Perhaps it won’t be too long before I get some more cousins!

 Also, on a side-note, just incase my brother reads this; it was a lovely ‘joint’ 21^st bash for you. My little bruv is growing up!