I wanted the world to swallow me up! by Imogene

On Saturdays I usually go food shopping with my parents, and whilst it's not the most entertaining of chores to do - it does get you out the house for a while!
Now I normally feel very confident in myself especially when it comes to my hearing; I know this does sound  odd for a Deaf person to state this. But I've always grown up in a very busy household, having 2 brothers and 2 sisters; it's quite safe to say there was never any lack of noise, squabbles and conversations. I loved my house and being in that environment! I also was always very close to my siblings growing up, so i'm sure this helped loads. I think growing up like that did help me overcome my issues with being Deaf as I learnt to laugh about any misunderstandings during any communications with any family members, also this is where I learnt my lip reading (It was a skill you needed). I was never given any special measures as a child, it was never a 'slow down and make Immy understand you' situation, and whilst many may read that and think 'Oh poor you' it never was like that, I went with it, if I missed something, I missed it, unless I chirped up and asked again, or I looked utterly confused and my parents would help me. It made me confident to be able to speak up and ask for help with anything that I needed, because simply there was too many of us to have one-to-one. Of course we did have some of them moments where mum would go through vocabulary and dad would help me get my point across through typing and explaining things in simpler terms and to be honest helped me very much when it was needed. I also gradually got this skill to be able to talk and have conversations with people through the next room (obviously voicing was quite loud) and where I can have my back to someone whilst doing something else - however to be able to do that it does have to be a voice I'm very comfortable with and is very familiar.
So as you can picture it, I'm with my shopping list going through Morrisons collecting everything on my list and any other useful items I happen to see that's on offer, loading them into my trolley. I tend to block the world out when I'm concentrating, but it's never a problem, no-one really speaks to you when you're shopping, do they?
I get to the tills and load up my shopping on the belt and rush to the front to start packing. As I go every week, there is normally the same people working on the tills. I have someone I recognize and start talking in polite conversation - I'm not the fastest packer, especially when i'm alone with a weeks worth of shopping, but I manage to pick up a fast pace. An Elderly couple start unloading their shopping onto the end of the belt whilst mine is coming down, I look up and smile at them whilst packing. I have to pay so I end up getting a little backlogged with a few items, entering my pin whilst trying to pack the final items. The couple had finished their bit and were then waiting for me to pull away until the woman mutters something completely incoherent to me and it stuns me, because normally I can pick a word up, but I didn't, so I say pardon and try again, nothing. Oops, this is getting a little embarrassing as I can't understand one word. I ask again, now attempting to purely lip-read her, but her lips are too close together so I couldn't attempt that, I then say "Sorry I'm Deaf" and she tries once more, which made the whole situation so awkward as I still didn't get her. I just didn't know what to do with myself as I tried so hard to understand her and failed like 4 times now so I just smile and look so confused (I'm guessing) because the checkout lady raised her voice and said 'Pink Drink' which made people from the surrounding tills look my way - as you would! I explained it was some version of squash my son likes and in a flash picked up the last few items and put them in the trolley.
And I have to say I never have felt so isolated in my whole life as I did in that moment. I think it was the shock that I couldn't actually pick anything up, it was almost like all the confidence I had in myself and my hearing, plummeted down to 0%. I was so embarrassed that I wanted to cry. Yes, I understand that sounds very dramatic, but I couldn't see a way of trying to laugh this one off.
I also have to confess that I haven't actually told anyone about this, so writing this is the first time I've shared this particular scary experience. Having gone through this experience it does make me appreciate how well I do cope on a day-to-day basis, and that I do sympathise massively with anyone that have this experience on a frequent basis. Normally I would pick something up and somehow would manage to make sense of it in my head or I'd get it by the 3rd time at a very push, but I never want to have that ever again. I quite literally wanted to be invisible at that moment. The only thing that made it worst was as I stepped away was hearing the checkout lady say "Oh don't worry, it wasn't you, she has them things in her ears.."

A Family Wedding: By Eleanor

 So, I was lucky enough to get invited to my beautiful cousin’s (and his bride!) wedding. Set in the middle of June, you’d be expecting lovely weather too. Well you’re not too far off, add a few showers which happened to time themselves when the photos were planned and you’d be right. Luckily the weather cleared up and we *touch wood* got some lovely photos.

 The wedding itself took place at Dragon’s Hall in Norwich, gorgeous building. Just enough place to hold everyone you love, or to quote Sam during his speech ‘It’s so rare these days to have everyone I care about in at one time’.

 Unfortunately, the building and the amount of people didn’t have great prospects for hearing. It is always daunting when I’m put into a room with lots of people I don’t know, and some I do. It’s even worse when the room is full of noise. Family conversations were impossible, and there were plenty of awkward silences as we realised breakdown of communication. I asked my mum if it were just me that struggled to hear, but she said that my uncle Neville had problems with his ears and Sam himself had an ear infection so I wasn’t the only one! She did also say it was difficult in there for, well, hearing people.

 The ceremony itself was exactly as I anticipated, simple and formal, just like Sam and Sophie (the bride) would like. Sophie’s dress was beautiful, not too over the top as I’ve often seen at weddings. It was clear that they love and care about each other very much which was sublime. I’ll admit I didn’t hear much of the two readings that different family members read out, but I’m sure they were just as pretty too. The vows were spoken and the pair were married at last!

 We then went back downstairs for the photos, which consisted of waiting around being offered delightful tasty offerings and champagne. My brother told me that there was a rainbow outside so I said ‘no’ and signed rainbow to him. I then started to sign ‘I can see a rainbow’ and asking what the next line was. This then resulted in my brother asking people, my nan asking people. Nan insisted that there was a line with colours in and asked me how I’d sign that. I explained I’d sign all the different colours and showed her a few, red, pink, blue etc. She seemed really excited about it all and encouraged my cousin Jack’s girlfriend Kristina to join in. Later, during the meal, Jack asked us if we wanted to read his lesson plan, which he had converted into his best man speech with his actual speech on the back of it. I started to read the back until my brother took it off me and told me to wait. I said I probably wouldn’t hear it anyway so I’d like to read it. My mum suggested Jack could sign it to me, but I am the only family member who actually knows any sign. Kristina piped in and signed pink and blue as I had shown her earlier. Everyone looked impressed. It was a sweet gesture, but sometimes it really disheartens me that no-one in my family know sign. It would really benefit me, I know I’m not fluent but even to just have Sign Supported English (SSE) or clear lip patterns would ensure I’m always included.

After the amazing buffet styled meal and the oh-so-good desert it was time to move onto the speeches. Unfortuntely I couldn’t really tell you what they were about. The first one, was done by Sophie’s dad (he seemed a lovely bloke). I only got bits and pieces, something about Sophie going to Africa and then something about Sam. It seemed very warming and everyone seemed to like it. The second speech was by Sam, which was lovely, I understood most of it. It was about meeting Sophie and thanking his family and then everyone else that had come to the big day. Then it was the turn of the best men (both his brothers). Jack did a lovely speech about how Sam was his best friend and the things they did growing up. He wished love and happiness for the young couple. Then it was Leon who I didn’t really understand. I asked if I could read the draft speech paper that he’d been reading off. When I read it, it was beautiful, a clear big brother role with embarrassing stories, including a brown log shaped toy that appeared in one of the baths they used to share.

After the speech I was lucky enough to have my boyfriend join me for the evening party when the band came on and the free bar got flowing. I find it strange when bands play, I don’t quite know what to do with myself. I can never seem to really dance unless I’m holding someone’s hand, and usually with rather a lot of alcohol in my system. To me, it just sounds like noise. I can’t hear the words, or the different instruments and I have no idea how to move my body to appropriate sounds. Everyone else on the other hand let themselves lose and had a good boogie! As my boyfriend says ‘I like a good dance, it’s good for the soul!’ It was lovely to see everyone dancing and enjoying themselves. Often, I find it more fun to watch than actually attempt to dance myself!

 During the night, I found moments where I realised I’d lost that connection I’d had with my cousins years ago. Back in the days when I’d stay over at my nans with my cousin and we’d giggle about sharing a big double bed together and planned menus to draw up for when the whole family came round. It made me think of times the whole family would be together and we’d play Trivia Pursuit or card games. I vaguely remember bingo making an appearance too. I know that life consists of paths and the further we follow a path, the harder it is to come back and remember those that helped you get there. It’s difficult to find the time to keep friendships going, and being aware of your common interests to help those conversations flowing.

 On the bright side, I was really happy that I managed to talk to my uncle Neville during the night. We talked about lots of different things including photography, sign language (where he proceeded to sign the whole alphabet) and he said he’d read my blog which was really sweet. He could understand where I was coming from with listening to bands, and it was just really nice to still have that connection with that side of my family. Thank you Neville, you really made my nightJ.
 I also got to play life sized Jenga against my brother, I lost the first game but it was totally worth it as he happened to be standing where it was falling. I don’t know if he was more worried about himself or his drink in his hand! And, to make it better, I won the second game.

 Thank you Sam and Sophie for inviting me to be a part of your big day, after all that waiting and preparation it finally arrived and it was sublime. I send you lots of love and good health wishes on your newly married life together. Perhaps it won’t be too long before I get some more cousins!

 Also, on a side-note, just incase my brother reads this; it was a lovely ‘joint’ 21^st bash for you. My little bruv is growing up!

Bridesmaids: A Review by Imogene

Bridesmaids

Directed: Paul Feig

Starring: Kirsten Wiig, Maya Rudolph, Chris O’Dowd, Rose Byrne, Terry Crews, Matt Lucas, Rebel Wilson, Ellie Kemper, Wendi McLendon-Covey, Jill Clayburgh, Melissa McCarthy

Genre: Comedy, Romance

Stars: 4.8/5

I have to say that I have been looking forward to seeing this film as soon as I saw the teaser trailer! I can’t explain why I never went to the cinema and saw it, but I never quite got there.

I firstly notice that the film cast are not all very well known actors/actresses (apart from Matt Lucas and Rebel Wilson) and despite that, the film didn’t disappoint at all!

The film is about a single lady in her 30’s named Annie (Kirsten Wiig) who is feeling sorry for herself as she’s lost her own bakery business, using all of her life savings to start it up, having no boyfriend (apart from Ted whom she has no-strings-attached sex with, and is always hoping for something more with!) and is sharing a flat with two people who don’t respect her personal space (Matt Lucas and Rebel Wilson). The only thing she sees worthwhile is her friendship with her best friend Lillian (Maya Rudolph).

Annie and Lillian have a very close friendship where they share everything and meet up constantly. Lillian one day tells Annie that she is engaged to her wealthy boyfriend, and naturally Annie was to be her Maid of Honour.

(Showing Annie her Engagement Ring)

I like this start of the film as we all have friends where we can relate to this friendship. It has a very sex and the city feel to it at this stage as it’s very girly with lots of giggling, but it does lay the scene of friendship very well here.. and we all know it’ll go wrong, but how?

At the engagement party Annie meets all the other bridesmaids, Rita (Wendi McLendon-Covey), Becca (Ellie Kemper), Megan (Melissa McCarthy) and Helen Harris III (Rose Byrne). Annie takes an instant dislike to Helen at the engagement party and they both become jealous of each others relationship with Lillian and there starts the competition for her affections.

There is such a funny scene where both Annie and Helen have a stand off for displaying their thoughts and feelings towards Lillian. They take it in turns and whilst it’s pretty hilarious for us viewers it does become increasingly awkward for the engagement party guests. Also another scene is where Annie is driving home from the engagement party as is impersonating Helen. I simply couldn’t stop laughing – simply as it’s something all us girls think and probably do!

(Annie's and Helen's standoff)

Knowing that both Annie and Helen have taken a dislike, Lillian try and encourage them to spend time together, but it doesn’t go too well as they both go into competition once again and purposefully try and hit one another with their tennis balls.

A while later Annie takes the Bridesmaids out for a meal to a Brazilian Restaurant for something to eat and to have time to bond together before the wedding. Whilst Lillian has gone to the toilet, Annie suggests a Paris theme for the bridal shower expressing how much Lillian wants to go there. All the other Bridesmaids are enthusiastic over the idea, but Helen shoots it down by suggesting, obviously a much better idea. After the meal Annie tries taking the girls to a top Boutique to choose the bridesmaids outfits, only to realise that she hasn’t made a appointment, but Helen cuts across and uses her powerful name to grant them access. Annie does not take this well. Whilst they are trying dresses on, one by one all the Bridesmaids start feeling sick and get a dodgy stomach (get food poisoning), which results in a very dramatic scene where they panic and are sick over one another in the restroom. Whilst this is happening Helen orders the dresses she likes best.

At this point through the film you start to see Lillian and Annie start slowly parting away which is sad as they’re childhood best friends. It’s sad to think that a close relationship can so easily become loose, and this is where we all start feeling for Annie as we see Helen stepping into her shoes by pushing Annie out of the picture. She starts acting like the Maid of Honour and Annie is very upset by this. However the restroom scenes were very funny and exaggerated! It got plenty of groans and ‘ugh’ but it was very amusing.. It was just disappointing that Helen didn’t fall ill though!

Worried about her finances, Annie suggests having the Bachelors’ Party at Lillian’s parent’s beach house (simply to save money). Helen once again, suggests this is a stupid idea and books them all off to Las Vegas instead. Annie refused to be bought so turned down Helens advances to buy her a First Class ticket, so stuck in coach feeling ill and scared of flying alone. Helen gives her sedatives and alcohol in the hope of calming her fears, but does the exact opposite. They make Annie paranoid, worried and completely erratic. She has many outbursts whilst on the plane which made the staff stop off in Wyoming, which results on the Bachelorettes’ party being cancelled.  Lillian suggests on the way back for Helen to take over the title of Maid of Honour as she’s worried for Annie’s wellbeing and says that she doesn’t seem up to the job.

 (Annies outbursts on the plane)

We see Annie start falling apart in these scenes, purely by Helens sabotage. Annie doesn’t feel good enough anymore and sees that she’s loosing the one person she needs. It’s very emotional as we all have some kind of experience of a close relationship that starts falling apart and no matter what we do we can’t save it. I personally felt a lot for Annie in this section of the film, as she’s trying her best but Helen seems to be so perfect that whatever she does will fall into the shadow.

Unlucky in love Annie continuingly hopes for a proper relationship with Ted, however telling him she’s happy to keep it casual. She begins flirting with Nathan Rhodes who is a nice, friendly traffic cop. He lets her off a ticket for having her taillights broken and she promises that she’ll get them fixed ASAP.  Nathan is a breath of fresh air as he actively encourages everything about Annie, including her tattered dream of a bakery. He tries to get her to reopen and try again, but she refuses as it hurt her too much the first time after it closed and doesn't want to even attempt going through that pain again. Annie opens up to Nathan and there seems to be a lot of chemistry going.

They both spend the night together and the next morning, he buys coffee and ingredients for her to bake and to also cook breakfast with. Annie is immediately offended of his suggestion and snaps at him saying that the night before was a mistake and leaves slamming his front door.

(Annie and Nathan getting to know one another)

This was such a sad part as they both get on so well and you see her enjoying herself for the first time since Lillian announces she’s engaged. But as it a Romantic Comedy we’ve come back to that all expecting, break up before the make up. Sometimes this clause does get quite tiresome, but in this film it was exciting because as soon as you saw them together for that first time you started rooting for a happily ever after!

After getting back to her apartment she meets both Gil and Brynn up to their usual tricks of making her feel uncomfortable. They call a flat meeting where they all suggests ways in which they can get on better, only for them not to take her seriously, resulting that they tell her they want her to move out. At her lowest, Annie has no support around her and makes the choice to move back in with her Mother.

Annie arrives at Lillians bridal shower, feeling angry that she sees her ideas all around her in the garden and house (the Paris theme). Having no money Annie results in making a handmade memory box for Lillian, which she loves and is happy it was received well. Helen makes an elaborate lie by saying she had no time to get Lillian a present and could only get her a card. Lillian opens the envelope and sees two tickets to Paris for the pair of them to go together and choose her very expensive wedding dress which is made by one of the top designers. Enraged by Helens present Annie once and for all says exactly what she feels out in front of the bridal shower guests. Lillian doesn’t take Annie’s outburst very well and exclaims that she has ruined the shower and tells her to leave and not bother coming to the wedding either. Annie leaves feeling heartbroken.

This film had some really entertaining bits and some shock factors. Annies outburst at the shower was a massive shock factor as whilst I, myself was thinking exactly what she was saying, how many of us would actually say and do that? Most of us would stew ourselves up and vent in another way, but I’m glad Annie did get to say what she wanted, as it did bring light onto how Helen is behaving. It was just sad that Lillian hadn’t realised what was going on, but of course, they never do.

On her way home Annie’s car breakdown and whilst it’s her final straw she finds Officer Rhodes coming to her rescue (or not). Still feeling hurt by the way Annie treated him, he acts very cold and tells her he doesn’t want her to contact him again, and to fix the taillight that she promised to do. Having no-one to call she rings up Ted and asks for him to ride her home. He suggests she does oral sex on him whilst he drives her home; she is disgusted and breaks off their ‘relationship’.

Feeling lonely Annie keeps inside and slobs about being depressed. Megan comes and tell her to sort her life out and stop feeling sorry for herself, it’s only her who can change the things that are wrong in her life – Annie takes notice of Megan and there begins an unsuspecting friendship between them. She bakes Nathan a cake and delivers to his door, over the few days she drives past his house only to see it left on the doorstep and racoons eating it.

The day of Lillians wedding arrives and Annie tells her mother that she isn’t attending as Lillian doesn’t want her there. Helen arrives at the doorstep in a panic saying that she’s lost Lillian and needs her help in finding her. Helen gets tearful and starts apologising for everything she’s done towards Annie and Lillians friendship and begs her to help her make everything right again. Annie decides to help and tries to catch the attention of Nathan in his car as she needs him to trace a phone number for her. As he is still feeling hurt over her past behaviour he reluctantly helps her and find that the phone is traced back to her house.

(As Annie is helping Helen find Lillian)

I loved the scene where Annie and Helen were repeatedly driving past trying to get Nathans attention! It was very funny and showed how much she needed him despite his reluctance. However annoyed he was with her he was always willing to help her when it came down to it.

Annie asks Helen to allow her to go speak to Lillian alone. She finds her hiding in her bed and Lillian tells Annie that she’s worried about her being alone and that Helen has organised everything and how she felt trapped without her friend. After making up and putting Annie back as Maid of Honour, Annie helps Lillian get ready for the wedding.

Annie gets to witness first hand the overdoing of Helens plans as there are fireworks, neon signs and Lillians favourite girl band Wilson Phillips. After the wedding Helen once again apologises for her behaviour throughout the engagement and says she hopes they can be friends in the future. She arranged for Nathan to come pick Annie up in his cop car. They share a kiss and he takes her home saying that he’s still going to charge her for her illegal doings.

It was a great film, I really enjoyed it.  It was lovely to see that Annie and Lillian were able to resolve their problems and overcome it by a mile. I had hoped that the film wouldn’t be ruined by the hype surrounding this film on release but now I do understand when people say it was the funniest film released that year. It was nice to see that even though it wasn’t the worlds most recognised cast that it didn’t ruin the humour or how we related, in fact I think it helped the film stand tall, as sometimes this type of film with the usual well known actors/actresses it can become very samey, but it didn’t, and I was very impressed! I hope to see more of this cast in big roles again soon.

I gave this film a 4.8/5 stars due to format, but storyline was very funny and I recommend to anyone wanting to have a girly night in as it’s a film you can join in with and simply laugh your socks off!

Imagine if this was to trend! by Imogene

HAHA!

I found this on Facebook, whilst strolling through my feeds. I personally found it hilarious and thought it'd be cool to share it with all of you on here. 

Also whilst this is funny, that I couldn't help think that it would be rather cool to see this happen for real. I for one would certainly feel more comfortable to have my Hearing Aids on show! I'd feel normal... well, until it was out of fashion..

(Photo is simply intended for laughs!)