Monday 28 December 2015

The one with the update from 2015 - By Eleanor


It's been a while since I've written on here. There are several reasons for that; the main one being that in the midst of being a student again and the seemingly never ending assignment writing, I seem to have forgotten about the importance of standing still. For those of you with imaginations like mine, I don't mean literally standing still, I mean taking the time to pause, absorb and take in the sights (with plenty of cake). Life is full of the little treasures that seem to get lost in the rush to grow up.

At 26 years old, you could say I'm grown up now. I don't know about you but I don't think anyone ever feels grown up. I've always felt my mind ages differently to my body and I'm unwilling to let anyone spoil the magic that is my imagination. What fun it is to feel excited about fresh sheets on the bed and hiding underneath when reading a new book (until it gets rather hot and you start worrying when the oxygen will run out). How delightful it is to walk in the woods with your welly-boots on, exploring new paths whilst the sun goes down to create the most extraordinary colours in the sky (until you realise its too dark and the monsters will come out). The delight of walking on the beach on the windiest day known to man, looking under rocks for crabs (till you start fretting that they'll be as big as your head and try to eat you). How wonderfully releasing it is to notice you've become so excited, you've forgotten to breathe in your sentences and commas are non-existent.

 I've been very busy since I last wrote. Decisions were made and thoughts were changed. I am now studying on a one year course PgDip Deaf Education. It basically means I will be qualified to become a Teacher of the Deaf, which as you'll know, is something I really want to be. It is actually one of the best decisions I've made. I'm enjoying the course very much and its brilliant to be in an environment where people have the same goals and motivation in life. We are all striving to give every deaf child the best chance possible. It's also really nice to feel like a strong link in the group. Education has not always been easy for me and I've always found it hard to relate to other students. Whether this is because of communication barriers - 'what if they ask me something I can't hear them?' 'What if I don't know the answer?' 'What if their accent is really difficult to interpret?' 'What if I pronounce something wrong?' 'What if they just don't get me?' - or perhaps just the way nature is, I don't know.
 Yet, finally, I'm with people who feel the same, who can perhaps envision the life I've had and know that it hasn't always been easy, but its mine and I made it what it is. And other children can do the same too with high expectations, lots of support and amazing parents/family around them. I finally feel that this is my field, I know what I'm talking about and I can see clearly now. I can see that I'm not destined to be different, I'm destined to MAKE a difference.

 I just have to be super careful not to spook the monsters under the bed in the meantime.