Getting Ready for Baby #2 by Imogene

I remember when I was first expecting my first son, I was so shocked but also so happy to learn that I was going to be starting a family. It's one of the things I have always wanted and expected that I would have eventually. I have grown up in a big family with 2 brothers and a sister, I also have another half sister. Having such great memories of my childhood and being blessed with amazing relationships with my parents - it's always brought such positive ideas about my own family that i'd have one day.

Naturally I'm quite a laid back person (obviously I have the worry/stress days as well as anyone!) and I found that through-out my first pregnancy I reflected this temperament. I didn't have many worries about whether he could potentially have a disability or anything could go wrong. I think most of that was because of my age, I was only 19 at the time. Also it's probably because I didn't know what to expect being a parent and that the pregnancy didn't become to feel real till I felt my son kick for the first time. It hit me really hard, I was going to actually be a mum. I did have the general little doubts of whether I would be a good mother, know what he needed when he cried, whether i'd cope with the late nights, that I may drop him.. It was really scary, but I was so excited to meet him, despite the doubts. My Husband at the time was in the RAF so I was still at home with my parents but we got married, moved into our own home and even though Chris (husband) was working away most of the time I stayed in our house alone, so most of the time it was just me and Freddie. Through them few months we bonded as he was the other person to talk to through that time - I also went home and saw my family etc but most of the time it was just us. I used to read to him, listen to music and of course nesting ready for his arrival! 

So when he arrived he was already my everything because he's been there a whole 9 months and we only got closer. Now he's nearly 3 and he's still a mummys' boy.

When Freddie got to be a Year Old, both me and my Husband decided we'd like to try for another baby, because we always talked about having a few children and we wanted Freddie to have someone to play and grow up with from an early age. 

Me and my siblings are 2 years apart and I remember the fun and games we used to have from a young age. Being to be able to have other siblings to play with was fantastic, I simply couldn't imagine being an only child.. couldn't imagine how different my life would've been.

It took over a year to finally get pregnant again (the more you seem to want something the more it sometimes seems to get out of reach!) but we did! Currently at 26 weeks and due at the end of April. I'm so excited to meet our other little man, it seems surreal that it's so close. 

It surprised me that during this pregnancy I have thought of all the bigger worries of having a child (the ones you would've suspected me to have first time around!), like him having a disability or a health problem, whether he's happy or not inside me. When I went to the anomaly scan at 20 weeks, I was incredibly nervous and felt sick - I never had this with Freddie but this time it hit me that during pregnancy you don't actually know what's going on inside of you; you know that they're developing into this beautiful human but everything else, you have no knowledge of. People always ask you 'How are you? Are you and bump OK? Is he well?' and when you've not had a scan since 12 weeks, the only thing you can think is 'well yes, i'm good, and I suppose they are too' which is a little scary as a mother to be. So many of my thoughts are a by product of maturing and from being a mother to a energetic lad. I always want the best for Freddie and for 'Archie' and knowing how well Freddie has developed I can only hope and wish that Archie shall be the same. It has also been a bit of a comfort to have regular scans due to being type 1 diabetic where they reassure me that all of his developing is fantastic and everything is really normal. I've been a lot less concerned since the 20 week scan as I know if there was a major issue they would've picked up on it (I have to hope!). It has also been really nice that one of my best friends is pregnant as well, she's a week behind at 25 weeks and it's been lovely to be able to text and meet; talking all things babies and pregnancy. A few times now we've had conversations of 'do you have it where you feel really sick if you bend down?' and it's like 'OMG YES!' - it's nice to know, it's all normal and happens to everyone else too!

This pregnancy has been different compared to my last. Archie has been a lot quieter in his movements compared to Freddie, I have to say that's the biggest difference, but then he probably has a lot to listen to what with Freddie and me talking constantly! I have also had more heartburn and earlier than I did during the last pregnancy. I've also been able to sleep better than last time - I rarely get woken up or feel unsettled - Freddie loved to kick me awake in the early hours!

Shows how different their personalities may be?
I have also been reading a book called 'The Secret Life of the Unborn Child' and it really opened my eyes to how much influence our mind has over the development and general psychology of our little people. It's an amazing book and anyone who is expecting should read it.

As I mentioned earlier that my Freddie is a big mummy's boy that I did wonder how he would behave and react towards having a brother and it's been very positive! I talk to him about when Archie is awake and what he's doing, I show him the scan pictures, I show him all his clothes and everything that we have got him so far. I make him feel included and he seems fairly happy with the idea of saying he's a big brother, kissing and hugging my bump (maybe doing that as it's seen what to do by daddy) and that Archie will be a baby - I guess the real impression will happen once he's born. But how he is generally I feel he'll be fine and that he'll love him (maybe not at being woken up in the middle of the night possibly) but I suppose he's too young to really grasp the whole picture and know what to expect, maybe he will when #3 comes!

He's fun, he's chatty and such a little handful! By Imogene.

From other articles I've written on this page you may now be aware that I have a 2yr old son, named Freddie. Being part of a 2yr olds life is interesting, fun and hard work but totally rewarding in every way! Freddie’s always been a talkative baby and that hasn't stopped during his development. His favourite sentence at the moment is “Mummy, what you doing?” and I take great pleasure in telling him exactly what I’m doing and letting him be a part of it – even if I didn't want to, he’s incredibly nosey so he would find out one way or another! But it can also get incredibly annoying after the 1000000th time.

In my last article about my time with my little man I was talking about how he’s increasing becoming more aware towards my deafness. He still is and now when he wakes up he shouts “Mummy!” really loud in my ear and well, it wakes me up. He sits on the bed talking at 100 mph, telling me everything he knows. (Yes, he really is that cute!) Eventually once I've stirred and have woken, I say “Slow down Freddie, I can’t hear you” and he jumps off the bed and gets my hearing aids and hands them to me. However cute it sounds, it does make me realise how aware he is of my deafness.

In our house, he has learnt that if he wants my attention, he is to either to come to my face and say what he wants (normally with pointing to it too!) and/or pull at my trousers/arm. Because I’m terrible if I’m busy and doing something that my hearing just fades out (I don’t know if any other people have this?) and I rarely hear what is being said. My husband is very supportive of this and does tell him to come to me rather than stand in the other room shouting my name! (I think a lot of this will get better with his age, and if we have any other children, he will probably teach them too.) We also have subtitles on the television all the time, even the children’s programmes, simply because it helps me for when I finally get to sit down or get dragged to come and watch a specific programme. So I can help interact about what the characters are doing and ask him questions!

I’m also finding that the older he gets the more he looks at my face whilst teaching him a new word, like the other day I was telling him how to say “Elephant” as he has a toy Elephant, he kept saying “Eleant” and I mouthed it and he kept saying it, but yesterday he said it properly – They always used to say that for a Deaf child you have to tell them the word 100 times before they knew how to say it properly. And I said it about 15 times to Freddie and he was saying it perfectly – so it also makes me think about how much my Mum must’ve interacted with me and spoke to me, saying the long words and getting pronunciation right! Bless her; she’s still helping me now with some things!

It's becoming quite a comedy in our Household most days, as only the other day the phone was ringing (I didn't hear it what with the lounge door shut) but Freddie did, and he kept coming to me and back to the door and because he can't say the words 'the phone is ringing' he was chatting madly and I just couldn't understand what he was saying, then it clicked the phone might be ringing and I pretty much went to run for it, and Fred ran with me going "run, run run!" - safe to say when we picked it up we couldn't stop laughing!

Is anybody else having the same experience at the moment with their little one or ones? Do you have a way of telling your child how to get your attention? I’d love to hear anyone’s experience or what they've heard are great tactics!