This is a topic myself and Eleanor was talking about the other day. We were chatting about one of the latest storylines in our favourite soap 'Hollyoaks'. The storyline is a couple of months old now, but it's about a young couple who have had a baby boy, and find out at the first hearing screen that he is profoundly Deaf. We both rather liked this storyline, what with being deaf, but also as it tackles and shows how people deal with their child having a disability. Like in most soaps they don't handle it very well. But after the screening, I enjoyed the episode where the mother went to visit, almost immediately after the birth to find a way to make her son 'hear'. It was very emotional as, she is desperate to help him and talks to the doctors about ways to make him a hearing child. There was a discussion on having a cochlear implant, but they found it wouldn't improve him anymore than he is. So they've gone against having the operation and now are living with a child who can't in affect hear anything.
It then lead to a discussion on how we would cope in the same situation and we both had different views with linking similarities.
I always think if I had a Deaf child that I'd be completely fine with it, as I'm deaf myself and have an understanding of what type of life you can lead with deafness; however that's only with hearing aids. But saying that, if my child had a profound level of hearing I would know that my child would almost be in safe hands as I know some teachers of the deaf around my area and I know they give 100% in the learning of each child. I would also know that there is support networks out there to help and there is BSL (British Sign Language) as a way of communication, so as a deaf person - It is possible to lead a normal life.
Obviously as a mother I'd worry about them growing up and hoping people become more deaf aware so that they can get the most out of their life. But as to quote Eleanor it is scary for new parents who don't know about being deaf and the support a child can get - it's terrifying. It's like if you imagine our child being blind - we'd worry!
Which is so true, it's only because we're in the boat, that we'd be easy to accept, but if it was any other disability we'd all worry and panic about the support and the type of life our child would be able to lead.
I personally did have the same worry with my son when he was born, not that he was Deaf, (I knew he was a hearing baby as soon as he came out) but the doctors did have a worry that he could possibly have cerebral palsy, and breathing problems as he didn't react to some of the tests they do to make sure they're healthy and everything is working as it should. At that moment when they said that I burst into tears, simply out of being scared. I didn't really know what it meant, nor what it was really - not enough to be clued up. But my gut instinct wasn't as if he did have any disabilities, some might say it could've been a natural denial state or mother intuition. It turns out he has neither of them things and is perfectly healthy!
But for that couple of days, I now understand when I read/see how people cope with a new baby being disabled. I suppose it's mostly because we all crave for a happy, healthy baby, simply as it's a easier life for them and probably deep down for us too.
So, How would I cope with the news of having a disabled child? I don't really know, I think I'd have to be in the position to be able to tell you. I know I would do my hardest to help to give them the best possible life, and make sure they were happy and felt loved. I know I would deal with them being Deaf very well, simply because I know how life is for that - so It's only because I have the experience. It's true, we're good with what we know.
I'd love to know your thoughts, or experiences with this article? How did you deal with the news that your child was deaf/had a disability? How would you cope with the news?
(This article is only of my own opinion and I hope non of the content offended anyone, as it certainly wasn't meant - Imogene.)
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